The Davenport's

Keeping up-to-date

2012-01-20T13:21:00.000-08:00

There isn't much happening here these days! Life has been quieter than usual which is AWESOME! I have loved the time to relax in the evenings with my kids, chat with James (or to be more correct, watch him fall asleep on the couch), go to the gym, make sure meals are on the table, etc.

In the quiet of these days we have decided to add a few things I've always wanted my kiddos to take part in...MUSIC LESSONS!!! Something I did as a child but we had yet to find time and money to have them participate in both athletics and the arts. It came up in a conversation with a friend of mine that she had been interested in beginning lessons with a few students. She was currently taking lessons herself but far enough along and avidly learning still, that she felt confident she could more than adequately teach beginner students. I liked the thought of presenting this opportunity to Lanae as she seemed eager to do something a little different (and to be honest I wasn't interested in another kid opting for outdoor activities)! In the excitement of engaging Lanae in said piano lessons, Jake expressed an interest and Sam again expressed his desire to learn how to play guitar. Now don't get all excited...we didn't register them all in lessons (that would be a bit much on the bank account even with the new tax deduction the government offers for endeavors into the arts)! We decided to go ahead with lessons for Lanae with my friend and with Jake opted to use the material my mom had been using to teach Sam a few years ago. Although I am not a pianist by any stretch of the imagination I do know enough of the basics, note reading, rudiments, etc. to give Jake a good start and much of the material that's out there seems to be geared to those who wish to self-teach. In Sam's case it is much easier as James is an avid guitar player (or at least was, he hasn't had the time or desire over the last few years to play) and knows a good deal about playing! We rented a smaller guitar from a local music store and James is setting up lesson times and plans to give Sam this opportunity.

In all the excitement of giving our kids this musical opportunity I feel inspired to brush up on my piano and learn the guitar as well. So far Lanae has had two lessons, I have done one with Jake, and Sam is gearing up for his first lesson this weekend with his dad and I have spent 15-20 minutes everyday on both the piano and the guitar reviving the small bits of musical talent I possess.

I am so excited to see where this takes us, although to be honest my main desire here is just to give our children an outlet to continue expressing their love of music. I have no intentions of pushing them to be concert pianists, rock star band members or anything beyond playing, singing, strumming for the sheer joy of music.

2012...How time flies

2012-01-05T11:30:00.000-08:00

So a new year begins and everyone is making resolutions, promises, brainstorming ways to make this year better, etc. Although I've succumbed to a bit of that, mainly the desire to get back to my regular routine of exercising which helps me feel healthy and more energetic, the truth is I've been a bit shocked at the fact that this past year flew by. As any year before, it's been full of ups and downs, memory making activities, soul searching moments and all around fun but I can't believe it's over.

To be honest I'm looking forward to a fresh start...a new attempt at deepening my friendships, strengthening my marriage, becoming more adept at understanding my children, exploring more of what makes me tick, and generally just allowing God to continue molding me. These are not so much resolutions as extensions of on-going personal betterment that flows through each year.

Christmas was a great time of rest. It was busy as I'm sure most people found their time over the holidays. But it was filled with laughter, joy, sleep, pajamas, gifts, family, friends, fun (a few tears but they were tears that led to deeper understanding and therefore good), and all good things that the season usually brings. My iPhone camera stayed tucked away for the most part (my only regret to this season) but the snapshots of important moments are tucked away in my mind's eye! We had the opportunity to spend some time with all extended family on both sides at various times through the two weeks of "vacation" and then rang in the New Year with family and a few visits with dear friends. It was a great way to end one year and begin another.

As we have headed into another year of "normal" life I am EXCITED! I'm not 100% sure why I feel this anticipation but it's a good feeling. I think that whether or not this year is just a year like any other or holds something new and different, it's going to be special. Perhaps it's perspective...perhaps it's the joy of the Holy Spirit...perhaps it's a bit of both! Whatever the case I'm going to enjoy this feeling of contented expectation.

I pray the same for those who are reading this and look forward to hearing how life in 2012 pans out!!!

A great picture of my beautiful kiddos as they wait to open their gifts Christmas morning. They were so excited but patient and attentive! A moment I will always cherish.

Communication

2011-12-20T10:23:00.000-08:00

com·mu·ni·ca·tion [kuh-myoo-ni-key-shuhn] - the imparting or interchange of thoughts, opinions, or information by speech, writing, or signs.

You might wonder why such an obvious post but really who doesn't understand the importance of this concept. I am NOT an expert in this area...I struggle daily with the best way to communicate, who to communicate with, boundaries in communication, etc. However, I think my pet peeve is people who do not understand that we should constantly be seeking BETTER ways to communicate.

Of course, there's a reason for the timing of this post but it's not really an important or integral piece of information that I need to share...it was just a glaring reminder to me that people have NOT PERFECTED this skill.

What I love about the above definition is that it gives so many, DIFFERENT ways in which we can communicate. In this day and age of technology there is really no excuse for not communicating with those around you and yet I wonder if the ease of communication has made us completely ignorant of the need for effective, appropriate communication. The funny thing is the other day I was watching a talk show and one of the guests was joking about how her young children are really only asking for "i" devices for Christmas (nothing much really, wink, wink). Then the conversation veered to how well versed children are in operating these devices at such a young age and how one day there will likely be a university course on "eye-contact"! Kind of a sad statement on society if that really is something we regularly jest about. It means we've lost the art of face to face contact which is definitely one of the MOST effective ways to communicate.

I know and understand that so many factors play a role in our individual communication...upbringing, personal tendancies, knowledge, family dynamic, etc. Really if you asked someone who has actually studied communication I'm sure they could write a thesis on what factors cause an individual to be strong in communicating or desperately lacking!

Really I have no words of wisdom to impart in this area but I have a eager request...could we all agree that we each individually need to seek better ways to communicate with each other. Could we all agree that we each have lots to learn in this area and commit to doing better. A resolution for the New Year perhaps...find two or three ways to improve your communication with your spouse, your children, your family, your co-workers, really anybody in your sphere of influence.

I know that's going to be a priority for me this year. If you know me, then feel free to challenge me on it:0 I'd love it if someone would say, "hey Elise, I really think it would be helpful if you tried _______________ in your communication with me this year!" Trust me folks, we'll get on much better with each other if we just choose to expand our communication skills;)

Crazy, silly

2011-12-09T10:23:00.000-08:00

Annie has always been a bit of a character. Not sure if it's because she's the baby of the family (although the most recent book I've picked up assures me that has something to do with it) or if her personality is just so incredibly unique and charming.

Either way this video is a clear indication of the fun and laughter she has brought to our household since the day she was born. I would love to show this video on her wedding day or at the very least save it for some special occasion when she's older, not to embarrass her but to give her a sense of how much fun we had with her as a child.

Many of you have already enjoyed this so it's mostly for my benefit to remain in the journaling I do to be able to go back and be reminded of days in my past. Either to laugh or to reflect on how blessed I really am:)

Just Like God...

2011-11-30T11:23:00.000-08:00

You know it's funny sometimes how you read the bible with such sincerety and then in a flash of humor God just reveals something to you that makes you laugh.

This morning was one of those moments. Now just for the sake of clarity, it's not like I was laughing hysterically or anything but I chuckled because God gave me such a clear picture of Himself I couldn't help myself.

So background....In my current position I was recently reminded that I needed to fill some requirements of our Head Office, which we'd missed when I started working more hours. It's basically an interview process in front of a panel of church leadership that assures the Head Office that I am in fact theologically sound in my biblical knowledge and teachings. To be honest, I knew I had to do this probably about 18 months ago but I thought by not reminding our Administrator I might be able to fly under the radar. Not the best approach I'm sure but having to fill out pages of theologically questions, provide references, then study for a one hour interview in front of 6 or so pastors is not my ideal forum for good times. My faith is personal, my experiences with God are personal, my understanding of scripture is often very child-like in it's manifestation (at least that's how I view it). To quote Beth Moore, "God is who He says is, God can do what He says He can do...". I do question Him but as I've shared before my belief in His faithfulness has never really waivered. But one of the topics that really stuck out to me was the creation of mankind in the image of God. To my knowledge that means we are physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually, etc. to some degree a replication, although not exact since we live here on Earth, of God's being.

Anyway, getting back on track. So yesterday I was having "A day" with my kids. I had been at work, the five minutes I had with them after picking them up from school started out well enough but the next five and many minutes after consisted of a lot of whining, complaining, talking back, arguing, etc. "I don't WANT to do the papers", "it's not fair", "where is my snack", "that's not true mom", "why are we eating THIS for dinner". My responses were along the same lines. "I don't care what YOU want", "I'll tell you what's not fair", "get your own snack", "it's true if I say it's true", "you have no idea what it's like to be a starving child in Africa and if you don't want to eat this then you can just go to bed without dinner". Sad right. So I pick James up from work and the first thing out of my mouth is a frustrated "grrrr" and me informing him that I may very well strangle one of our children the next time one of them whines at me. I'm sure I'm the only mother who's ever said that;)

Fastforward to this morning...I'm sitting in staff meeting and our devotional is focused on Exodus 33. We've been studying the Israelites and the journey from Egypt and their constant need to be reminded and shown God's faithfulness. I'm sure there were so many more truthes and nuggets of goodness I could have pulled out of that but you know what I read and laughed at...verse 3&5 which are basically the same thing repeated, "Go up to the land flowing with milk and honey. But I will not go with you, because you are a stiff-necked people and I might destroy you on the way." I actually laughed out loud (quietly though because I didn't feel like sharing my amazing revelation). I felt such relief and actual joy at the realization that we are indeed created in the likeness of our God. Now let me be clear that I am in no way comparing myself to God and my responses were not really acceptable toward my children, also God's frustration and anger are definitely justified while mine is likely just selfish and unnecessary...BUT in reading the entire passage I saw that God loved/loves His children. He was still giving them the land and sending His angels with them but He was putting them at a distance from Himself because they had done nothing but complain, backslide, betray, disengage from Him over the course of their journey.

This great revelation gives me a moment to ponder that I need to re-evaluate in my own response to Him. How many times have I complained, whined, talked-back to Him regarding a circumstance that in my narrow vision appears unjust. If, as a parent, I experienced even a teensy bit in dealing with my children of what He experiences when dealing with His children I should be more than willing to step back and re-evaluate how I'm responding to where He's put me. It also gave me pause to rest in the IMAGE I have of myself. When I see my reflection in the mirror I can have a greater confidence that I have been created to be a small piece of the greater reflection of who God is.

Adversity

2011-11-22T12:06:00.001-08:00

The title of this post feels a little like deja vu! I searched my blog to be sure and came up with nothing but in reality I think we can all relate to the fact that adversity shoves us to the ground on a pretty regular basis.

In all honesty I feel a bit manic writing this post as my last entry was about balance and last week I could have written an entry that may have been entitled something along the lines of joyfulness or excitement but this week has brought a certain level of adversity that I haven't faced for a number of years.

I guess the reason I feel the need to write is the emotional outlet it allows to put in words the feelings that jumble my brain. The reality is that the adversity I feel has descended upon my little family over the last few days is nothing compared to what others face but to me, it does feel like an overwhelming storm cloud that just won't let up. The question I ask myself, as do many others, I imagine, who face adversity is, "what do I do with this?". How do I move beyond the black cloud, how do I get out from under it, how do I release the pit in my stomach?

As a believer my first line of defense really is crying out to God. This morning my prayer was that as He sent the angel before the Israelites into the lands of their enemies that He would also send His angels before our family as we navigate this trying time. I prayed that as I drove to work this morning and then I passed a little church on the corner that often has quirky, strange messages on their sign, it read, "Jesus will do it all for you". For just a minute I felt the presence of the Holy Spirit fill me. My stomach was no longer clenched with worry, my mind felt clear. It didn't last for long because my human nature is strong and stubborn but it gave me the hope I needed to engage the second line of defense.

That second line of defense will be something I will always value and cherish. The opportunity to send a vague but desperate message to a small group of trusted friends who I know will immediately be on their knees on my behalf. I recently read a book that talked about how when we're in our darkest places and feel so far from God the prayers of those on our behalf will lift us up and God will hear those and bring restoration. I wouldn't trade these women for anything and I am so thankful that God is a God of relationship.

The third line of defense (rightly or wrongly) was to open the bible and seek wisdom. I asked for God to give me a verse that could be lifeline for the time being. Now I'm not a real big believer in just letting the bible fall open so instead I like to open my concordance and see what I can find on a topic. I searched the word "adversity" and this is what I came across...

"In the day of prosperity be joyful, But in the day of adversity consider: Surely God has appointed the one as well as the other. So that man can find out nothing that will come after him." Ecclesiastes 7:14.

That was exactly what I needed to hear. That God has indeed already gone before and has knowledge of what He is doing, even if the adversity itself is not of Him. The funny thing was that the response from one of my great friends was that what we face today, tomorrow, however long it lasts, is not a surprise to God. He knew long ago that this particular space in time would come.

The final line of defense, which is my second nature, is to talk. Again I am seeing how God answered my first prayer...to go before us...because as I pulled into the parking lot to start work another great friend was there for the morning to do some Christmas decorating and she has been in the exact position I find myself in. I was able to unload some of my worry and find solace and reassurance in her experiences. My tears could be spilled in a safe, comforting conversation and the love of God shone through her words of kindness, gentleness, encouragement and support.

I guess in sharing this I find a bit of healing. In rereading how God is giving hope I pray it not only manages to be a constant reminder to me of His power but to give others hope who may also be facing an adverse situation. We don't all react the same but we know that God is the same and His power, mercy and grace remain constant when the world is in turmoil.

Balance

2011-11-15T12:19:00.000-08:00

= a state of equilibrium or equipoise; equal distribution of weight, amount, etc.; mental steadiness or emotional stability; habit of calm behavior, judgment, etc.

Such a funny word and yet the ultimate achievement for women around the world today. The last few months have challenged my choice of how I balance life...what priorities I put on being a wife, mother, daughter, employee, friend, volunteer, etc. The list for today's woman goes on. I can choose to busy my schedule with unlimited activities, many of which I have incorporated into my routine: work, bible study, PAC, sports, newspaper route, child-minding, cooking, cleaning, baking, volunteering, organizing, educating myself and on it goes. I list these things not to receive praise but to acknowledge that we all fill out time with MANY, MANY activities. Then we lament the loss of simplier days!

Don't get me wrong. I'm not presuming to suggest that returning to the days when women stayed at home all day doing what women do is the answer to the desire to find balance. What I am suggesting is we need to re-evaluate how we prioritize. The reality that a day will come when we will regret the lack of time spent with our little ones, the loss of opportunity to prepare feasts of baking, cooking, snacks will hit us square in the face as we sit to a meal of two (or even one).

The moment that brought me to a screeching halt occurred about two months ago on a Tuesday morning at 8:30am as I pried the smallest fists from my neck and handed the small, tense body of my screaming two year old to my mother-in-law and walked away to go to work. I could hear her sobs even from a distance and her cries for "mommy" broke my heart. In that moment all I could ask myself was whether all the money in the world was truly worth the devastation I felt at leaving my youngest child in such a state. Of course, I knew she was safe, she would be loved and cared for but how could I walk away knowing her only desire in that moment was to be with her mommy. Thankfully, checking in later I was reassured that she was fine...a trip to McDonald's and shopping with Nana was a quick fix to her discontentment.

It left me wondering all week what we hold dear. I haven't quite determined what order the things in my life should take but I know one thing, I am tired of wasting the precious time I have with my little family. It's not a matter of cutting everything out and holing up in my house but I am determined to be more intentional with my time. Be deliberate in everything I do. Schedule my hours so while my children are out of my home I am making the most of of "my" time so I can then focus my attention squarely on their needs.

As we enter the busy season of Christmas I am reminded how easily we get caught up. Often it's the kind of caught up that has a negative connotation but for me it's a purely postive kind of "caught up". I personally love the peace I feel at driving with Christmas jingles playing in the car, hearing my children belt out tunes that are only played once a year but they are the same ones I sang as a child. I love the coziness that I feel about all things Christmas everywhere I go. The consistency that the next 6 weeks brings...it occurs every year, at the same time with the same amount of ferver.

What boggles my mind most is that as much as the world has tried to remove Christ from this season, I feel an inexplicable amount of anticipation and joy at what is coming. At this moment I will revel in that and try my best to carry that through the rest of the year. I challenge you as moms, daughters, sisters, wives, employees, volunteers...women of Christ to be caught up in what this season means. Be the light in a place that is very dark for some. Set aside time to share with your family the love you have received from your Heavenly Father. Be intentional about what you have to offer the people God has placed in your family and in your direct sphere of influence. Don't be afraid to re-evaluate your priorities, in fact it's an exercise you should engage in every six months or so. As the face of your commitment changes so do your priorities.

On a side note, my littlest has become much better about leaving me but I have the luxury of spending one day a week with just her for 6 hours straight and she is very aware that this is her "mommy-time". We can't all do that but there are so many resources available to help you plan the time with your children.

A few ideas off the top of my head (some my own and some from other families)
- choose one night during the week that everyone is at home (try to make it a weekly occurence or at the very least every second week). Plan nothing, be spontaneous but creative in the activities you do...games, movies, popcorn, etc. things that everyone can participate in.
- a date night once a month with each child (this can get pricey, time-consuming and overwhelming if you go overboard so keep it low-key). Something as simple as hot chocolate and a donut can bring an immense amount of joy to your child. It's the fact that you took a few minutes to just get to know them.
- sun-up to sun-down...a girlfriend told me about this one. She took one of her sons to watch the sunrise, had breakfast with him, took him swimming, just spent the entire day with him and then they went home (they missed the sunset). This wouldn't be something you'd do often but it's worth it if you have a day and a few extra dollars to spend.
- date night in. My husband and I are aiming to do this once a week. We choose not to afford a sitter on a weekly basis and we have wonderful parents who watch our children so I can work so instead of going out we wait until the kids are in bed and have a nicely prepared meal, dessert, chat and movie together. It saves on the budget since we're not going out but it affords us time together and focusing on our marriage.

A few thoughts to leave you with. I would love to hear your ideas on ways you keep your family and marriage connected! So post a comment below:)

Peace

2011-05-24T13:54:00.000-07:00

Peace...it's a funny thing! Easy to talk about, easy to teach about, easy to think about, BUT not so easy to actually embrace and feel.

I was teaching the kids in Children's Church this last Sunday on the passage found in Matthew 6:25-34! It's the scripture that talks about how God has clothed the lilies of the valley and how much more He loves us...so we should not worry about our lives (a brief synopsis but feel free to read the whole passage). I found this really cool object lesson so the kids, leaders and I traipsed outside to find dandelions. They all came back with these weeds in various stages of growth and we talked about how amazing it is that God has provided these things, that we try to destroy and kill every year, with the means to survive, grow well and even reproduce.

Although some of it was common sense I felt inspired again by the creativity of our Father as I read to the children some of the amazing facts about these silly little "flowers". Did you know that the reason the stem is hollow is so that in rain and wind they bend without breaking and then stand straight again? Did you also know that the reason the leaves are so jagged and ugly is because they are perfect shape for collecting and draining rain water to the root of the weed? On a seedhead, have you ever noticed that it's shaped a bit like a parachute? It's so that when you blow it off it spins far away so as not to compete with other seeds for earth to grow! And of course, if you look at a seed under a microscope it's shaped like a screw so that as it's falling to the ground it actually SCREWS itself into the earth giving it a better chance to take root and grow!!!!

I'm not sure the kids were as in awe as I was over this whole description but I felt like I was seeing this concept for the very first time. When I asked the kids to put their hands up if they thought God loved them as much as the dandelions, I thought for sure a sea of hands would fly to the air but you know what...our smart, faithful, godly children reminded me of exactly what I was about to tell them...GOD LOVES US MORE!!!!!!

The funny thing was that immediately following our lesson I texted my husband (who was at home trying to tackle some yard work because he rarely has time to accomplish it) and asked him how things were going. He promptly responded with "not good, talk later"! In true human fashion I immediately took to worrying. The peace I was just preaching about eluded my grasp and I set my mind to a million different things that could bring such a response.

He called, apologetic for making me concerned but informed me that our garage door had literally fallen off the hinges and each panel had rolled off the track and when he arrived home from dropping the kids at church it was hanging all askew. Needless to say I felt sick to my stomach. Thankfully I have an amazing husband and an amazing father, who both took it to themselves to fix this problem with immense speed so as not to have to witness a frantic woman return home to such an issue:)

As I drove home after church, it hit me square in the face...what good had it been for me to teach this lesson if I couldn't even bring myself to try and practise it? Is God not so much bigger than the broken garage door? Is He not capable of providing for my every need when people around the world live in poverty but that same God gives them their daily bread? Why is it so hard for me to practise these simple life lessons when I have such abundance. It was a good, practically applicable moment of teaching FOR ME in the finer points of faith in God!

Perhaps this Sunday, as I teach about patience I should expect to find a situation in my path that actually challenges me to live the concept out! I do hope it doesn't follow suit with the passage though because I KNOW I am not ready to live the life of Job:)

Washed

2011-05-13T22:05:00.000-07:00

The last few weeks I have been pondering an idea that is far from new! It is a truth I have held dear since before I can even remember consciously embracing it. Followers of Christ accept a basic principle the moment they recognize the authority of the Holy Spirit in their lives...it's the knowledge that Christ came to die for our sins and wash us clean.

A verse that I looked up before I even started this post was 1 Corinthians 6:11, "And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God. " The main reason that I began thinking on this truth afresh is because of a beautiful song that I love to listen to. It's called "Washed by the Water" by Needtobreath.

The thing I love about this song is that it reminds us that life is filled with difficult situations but through these times we find redemption. I think part of it for me is also looking at this idea with a new perspective because of where I live. I know that might sound a bit odd but living in this area we see A LOT of rain. Sometimes I get frustrated by the dreariness it brings but thinking about it from the perspective this song encourages I see how rain also cleanses us. Rain can be horrible, devastating, terrifying but it can also be pure, clean, and refreshing. The funny thing is that I have been thinking about this off and on over the last month as we all patiently wait for Spring to arrive in all its glory. But on the days that rain seems the weather forecast for the whole day, I do take a moment to celebrate all it does for us...then I started reading this great book by Francine Rivers, "Her Daughter's Dream" (c. 2010).

A part of this rings true to my own life but what struck me was one particular exchange:

"They walked along the beach together, not saying anything. Boots didn't seem worried about the blanket. When they turned back, she bent and scooped up a stick, twirling it in her hand like a baton. 'You're eating yourself up with guilt and worry, Carolyn, and it's got to stop.' She stopped and jabbed the stick into the moist sand. 'Write down every sin you've committed right here in the sand. Let it all out.' She walked up the beach onto dry sand, spread the blanket and sat. 'Take your time!' she called out. She lay back, arms beneath her head, and crossed her ankles.

Carolyn barely managed to write a few words before a wave came and washed them away. She wrote more, and the waves came in again, erasing her words. She wrote and wrote, and each time the sea came and swept away her confession. She didn't know how long she bent to the task before she finished. Her feet were numb from the cold water. She tossed the stick into the surf and watched it carried out. For the first time in weeks, her chest didn't feel like someone was sitting on it.

'Finished?' Boots called.

'For now.'"

The picture to the left reminds me of this exchange. Having read it I was reminded of the many times I struggle with understanding how to let go of the wrongs in my life. Either done because of my sinful nature or against me. Either way my human nature instinctively clings to remembering each incident as if to disallow God's redeeming grace to cover and cleanse these wrongs.

As I reflected on this amazing new visual I envisioned myself in the shoes of this character. Stepping onto a beautiful, perfect scene created with such unique talent and power being marred by the imperfection of my words scratched deep into the earth. The ugliness it creates, such a tragedy to gaze upon. But the water comes to return this pristine panorama to its original beauty. The water is healing and redemptive in nature. It actually does wash away the words and the sand returns to the way it was.

I was so struck by the reality of this analogy. Then I thought more about the last few words. I realized that each day brings its challenges and each day I will likely be at the edge of this water writing the sins I've committed and each day the waves will wash them away. BUT...what I can find complete and utter safety in...is the words spoken on the cross...the words that have new meaning for me as I realize that although I know each day is test in my faith I no longer need to question whether or not I will find redemption..."IT IS FINISHED"...spoken by the man who gave His life to secure my cleansing and give me a life eternal.

I realize water is a metaphor for the blood of Christ but what I LOVE about this world we live in, is that our Creator has made ALL things to bring us back to Him...to remind us of the relationship we need.

The next time you feel yourself down in the dumps during a rain storm, play that song and spend a few minutes worshiping. You'll find your spirit uplifted and your perspective renewed.

Divine Inspiration

2011-04-08T11:48:00.001-07:00

EASTER...As a believer in Christ this time of year is a BIG DEAL! It's the reason we have hope, it's the basis for our entire faith belief. But as per usual it's been commercialized, just the same as Christmas. In many ways I struggle with the idea of condemning the secular celebration as it seems that people are grasping for hope and this is the best way they know how to find it. Are they looking in the wrong place? ABSOLUTELY, but their motives stem from a sense of desire to bring sense to their life, bolster the value of family, live in community AND the need to just have fun.

In my daily life I try to find that balance with my kids! Instill in them the respect for the sacredness of Easter...the understanding that we have so much more to celebrate than easter egg hunts and chocolate...even more than fellowship with our friends and family. I know I don't always do a great job at it and this year it's my desire to do it differently. To help them understand just how important it is, even more so than Christmas. This year I have coordinated an Easter program at Church...not something we usually do but wanted to try. Things have come together so incredibly well that I can only give credit where it's due. God! I have felt nothing but affirmation in my desire to see Him be glorified this season. This week has been the epitome of seeing God's hand bring things together.

First, although we have yet to seen the completed product, our program has come together with amazing ease. The kids are memorizing like crazy, the music has been learned and when we've been practising the kids have been belting out the words like pros. Costumes arrived on my doorstep this morning and THEY ARE PHENOMENAL! The little animals will look so sweet and I was reminded in the creation of these beauties that working with people in their gifting is incredibly rewarding both for them and for me.

Second, we are participating in a passover meal on Sunday! I am so excited for James and I and our children to experience this amazing Jewish tradition that was a Holy part of Jesus' last days on earth. I love that we can embrace aspects of Jesus life in a new way even as mature believers.

Third, Good Friday...our church has a great tradition of breakfast in the morning and then an Artwalk. This year the theme is "From the Cradle to the Grave"...members of the congregation enter pieces of art and they are placed in a way that people can walk through and reflect on the life of Christ and the meaning of Easter. We have been eager to keep the children involved in this as well and this year I was really struggling with something that would be meaningful to them and nice to display. I thought at first that they could do a mural and work together, all ages putting a beautiful piece of work together. However, two weeks ago a faithful children's worker came to me with 100 FREE wooden eggs. They were perfect in shape and size and an idea started to percolate. What if we had the children paint these eggs with something meaningful to them about the life of Christ. It would be an excellent way for them to experience turning something secular into something sacred. Then I began to wonder how we could make the entire process of creating these eggs something sacred and this, my friends, is why I love my Heavenly Father so much....!! I prayed that He would inspire me with an idea of something that could bring the two together in a meaningful way for the children.

At first it started with putting together a small Easter Egg hunt for the kids. Giving them a bit of fun and joy in the season...then I began to think on how we could incorporate scripture and I realized, "what if we put a small goody bag together for each child with a scripture and the wooden egg". It would give them an idea for painting, help them put together Easter with their faith and a little bit of chocolate never hurt anyone. But I still felt there needed to be more. Just doing an Easter egg hunt still felt a little "unspiritual". I realize that not every child will catch the amazing inspiration that I have felt and perhaps God means it only for me but I feel that He gave these ideas to me in order to pass them on to the children under my care.

Anyway, so as I pondered it more I realized that in so many ways the secular tradition of Easter Egg Hunting can be transformed to take on a much deeper meaning. First, the act of "looking" or "searching" is so biblical. In many ways, as humans we "search" in the wrong places. As a child, I remember playing the game hot and cold. We'd search for an object and another would tell us whether we were "hot" or "cold". An Easter Egg Hunt can be like that...if you look in the wrong places you will never find the Egg/chocolate. Much like faith...before one comes to Christ we can search in so many wrong places and even as a believer we can lose site of our goal and start moving into the "cold" area (further away from our Creator). Second, when we do finally find the "treasure" of chocolate, it's a gift. Someone who loved us bought it, hid it and once we find it we can literally just partake of the "gift". Salvation is exactly the same...sometimes it takes us a bit to discover it but when we finally do it's simply a matter of accepting it and partaking in the joy it brings.

Daddy

2011-03-08T09:12:00.000-08:00

It's been a while since I've posted...mainly because there hasn't been much to say aside from the normal busyness of life. There are moments here and there that catch me and I think of writing but the moment passes and I choose to file it in my mind instead.

This morning a deep feeling has lodged itself in my soul. I can't explain what it is because it's not really one feeling but many, many feelings that I can only describe in one word..."DADDY".

I often ponder the majesty of creation, specifically in relation to the differences between men and women. Being a woman I cannot fathom how a man functions, perceives life, copes with struggles or feels with each passing day. What I feel, is so often vibrant and consuming...each situation brings a new set of emotions and everything is intertwined. We joke about the differences in men and women, we laugh at how it affects our communication with each other, we strive to overcome it but all to often it is the reason for hurts, frustration and even anger. But when things boil down we need each other, we need the differences, we need the change in scenery that makes our unique perspective.

Today the thing that I have felt so deeply is the relationship that each woman craves and it has been designed to come from one individual. Some women may say they DO NOT want this, they are independant and free, a man just complicates things...I beg to differ. As a grown woman I still feel the "princess" inside me calling for his approval, his love, his gentle embrace. My daddy, the one who protects, who loves, who cherishes, who gives of himself, who hugs, kisses, dances, tickles, and so much more.

As a child, my dad worked hard, he drove long haul and often wasn't home. To be honest I don't remember the not being home part but I remember vividly the feeling of unsettledness at certain times. The creaking in the house was louder, the roar of the furnace sounded like a monster, the movement of my siblings and mom in the night were foreign, nothing was as it should be when daddy wasn't safe and sound in his bed. The protection I wanted was not readily available to me as it should be...my daddy was not there to spring into action at a moment's notice.

From my teen years until a few years ago I really took for granted the relationship I had with my dad. We have never been super close, not the kind of close that some fathers and daughters share. My mom and I had a great relationship and she was the one I went to when life was too much or problems needed solving. It didn't mean less love for dad it just wasn't expressed outwardly. Over the last few years I've come to appreciate so many things about my father. He's stoic, hard-working, kind, caring and giving. Many more things spring to mind but these are a few of his obviously strong points. We both have come to recognize the need for a more intentional relationship and try, as time allows, to keep up-to-date on each other's lives. The one thing I don't think I've ever shared with my dad is just how much he means to me. As he prepares to, yet again, put the needs of his family first, and spend the next few years commuting between his home here and his work up North, I am struck by how his presence affects the dynamic of our family and how much I value and cherish his presence in my life. Although I have a wonderful man who meets all my "princess" needs now, I count on the presence of my father to be there, "just in case". I love him dearly and am so glad that I still have this time with him.

Maybe the last few years have touched a nerve in my soul at the shortness of life. I see around me dear friends who have never had a dad, or a dad who was there but not really there, or even worse have just lost their father and my heart aches for each one and serves as a reminder for me that as God has graced my life with an earthly father within my reach, I should not let a moment be wasted. It serves as a reminder to me to encourage the men I know that have daughters to seek those cherished times. The little princess' that dance around your living room and look with emploring eyes for your approval, give them what they crave...give them what God has created you to give them...love, care, nurturing, hugs, kisses and dancing. I listened to the song by Steven Curtis Chapman this morning, "Cinderella" and the words struck my soul. All every little girl wants is to find the protection and security that "dancing" with her father offers. A place where hope thrives, where joy can be rediscovered, where we feel all is right and the palace is but a step away. A place of refuge in a lonely, hurting world. The arms of a father to lean into when the storms of life hit, when all seems lost, one place to seek solace and comfort.

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And for those who cannot find that here on earth, I am struck by how we can turn to our Abba Father...the one who created us to be this way, to need protection and comfort, the one who longs to "dance" with us, to be the Prince we seek. The Psalmist tells us that God has seen our troubles and he alone will help the fatherless. We can call on him to bring the peace and joy that surpasses human understanding and He WILL comfort.

So dad, if you read this rest assured that you are a staple in my life...a man I trust and count on. I thank God everyday that although our story is not neat and tidy that He brought us together and keeps us in each other's lives. I am thankful that you have been the model for me that allows me to seek my Heavenly Father when you're not near. That I am not fearful of what God is like because I know that a small part of Him is modelled in you. Thank you for being my dad and for loving me as I am.

God's Sovereignty

2011-01-20T22:18:00.000-08:00

As I mentioned in my previous post I've been working through a study on 1 Samuel. One of the more recent sessions began a discussion that really struck a nerve with me. I've never been in a situation that has left my faith shattered to pieces. I haven't experienced that moment that makes me really question if God is real or if I've chosen the wrong path for my life. Don't get me wrong, I have questions...they just aren't devastating, life-altering questions.

This particular topic though has given me something to think about over the last few weeks and I'm sure it will resonate with many fellow, Christ-followers.

It started with a read of 1 Samuel 16:1-23...if you have a moment, read the passage because it's a great portion of scripture but what led to the big question can be found in verse 14, "Now the Spirit of the LORD had departed from Saul, and an evil spirit from the LORD tormented him." I have read the story of Samuel, Saul, David and Jonathan but have NEVER come across that passage in a meaningful way. Do you see what it says and what the implications of that scripture could be? I read it, I studied my bible study notes, I poured over that small passage for days. How could the evil spirit that tormented Saul have possibly come from God. First I couldn't fathom the God I know to be in any kind of relation with evil and second, that He would choose to SEND an evil spirit to torment His own creation. It seemed to have so many implications...does that mean God controls all the evil in this world, does He purposefully send bad things to the lives of His children, how can He love us so much but do these types of horrible things to us. I struggled with this question into the next week as we talked about Hannah and her barrenness. I questioned how a loving God could then purposefully close the womb of such a godly woman (if you read the story of Hannah, you see that she LOVED God and served Him, yet He continued to keep her womb closed). Does this same loving God close the wombs of women today and why does He do this? Does He give cancer to those sitting in hospital waiting to die? Does He purposefully cause floods, tsunamis, earthquakes, that devastate nations to their very center?

My brain continued to argue and my heart began feeling weighted with this terrible sorrow for the image of who MY God was and that I was losing that image to a much darker picture. It wasn't so much that I felt He wasn't/isn't God but that MY God of grace, mercy, HAPPILY EVER AFTER...wasn't so true. My picture was becoming tainted with reality and understanding of a MUCH BIGGER God!!!

Maybe age really does bring wisdom, maybe experience brings wisdom, maybe it's both or maybe it's just the true desire and seeking after God's heart brings clarity to faith.

A few things came across my path the following week and a half that gave me a more stable perspective but I just couldn't let go of this idea that God has somehow caused great suffering in those who love Him and a feeling of great letdown at this revelation. Why? Why would you do that...How could you do that...Don't you love us so much more than that???

My heart's desire is to know and follow but my intellectual mind cries for understanding and justification.

I prayed and peace came...I wasn't about to let Satan have a stronghold like that and I know that God was fighting that battle too. But I came across a short article posted by a co-worker that nailed it on the head for me.

http://www.relevantmagazine.com/god/church/features/24107-the-tested-faith-of-matt-chandler

Again if you have time read the whole article but if not then here's a brief synopsis and what really struck me. This pastor is famous (I've never heard of him but he preaches in the states to a congregation of 7000). He's young, married with three children. As he puts it everything he'd touched turned to gold...until the day he was diagnosed with cancer of the brain. Brain surgery, chemo, seizure, recovery, not a hopeful prognosis at all but this was his response...

“There’s this part of me that’s so grateful that the Lord counted me worthy for this.”

This was, of course, the first flash of, "wow, I think I need a shift in perspective of this whole, what is God doing thing"! Then he followed it up with these thoughts...

"After all, if he believes God is sovereign in all things and that events in a Christian’s life are God’s will, does that mean God gave him cancer? And if He didn’t, what does that say about His sovereignty and perfect will?"..."Chandler says. “I don’t think God gave me cancer … but He knew it was coming. He certainly didn’t stop it, and He’s certainly able to. The whole Scripture is: bad things happen in a fallen world, and God is enough in those things and uses those things to the Glory of His own name.”...“It’s not punitive; it’s not random; and it has not been given to us by God to show us who’s boss,” Chandler says. “There’s a purpose in it; there’s a limit in it; and in the end, God is not going to give to us what He will not sustain us in. And I believe at that moment, the Holy Spirit gives you the power to stand. That’s exactly what we found out. And I’m rejoicing in what He’s doing in it.”

How on earth could I possibly argue the Sovereignty of a God I've committed my life to when all the "earth-shaking" that's happened in my life is a simple bible study on 1 Samuel. I've never experienced this type of life-or-death situation so why would I need to question who God is and why He does what He does.

In truth it gave me perspective. Perhaps I will face tragedy in my life...I have no doubt I will face hardship but perhaps that tidbit of information will prepare me to make a statement such as Matt Chandler. Perhaps it will serve to strengthen my resolve to allow God complete control over my life instead of holding back.

If my deepest heart were known it would reveal that I still doubt, I still question, I still wonder how this all lines up but my conscious mind is choosing to leave some questions to be answered on the day I meet my Creator. Perhaps in the meantime I can find that balance between God's Sovereignty and His utter devotion and deep love for His children that would soften His heart to hear our prayers as we DO seek to do His will.

Feet Washing

2011-01-16T17:04:00.000-08:00

I am desperately trying to catch up on my posts so I will follow this up over the next couple of days with some Christmas posts!

But today I just felt the need to write about the amazing service we had this morning. For some of you who attend you will probably have your own take on the experience and for those who have never participated in "washing feet" it will hopefully trigger a desire to find ways to wash the feet of some unsuspecting individual:)

To start I should give you some background regarding what's been on my mind as of late...I have been wondering if the job I do makes that much of a difference. It's not that I don't believe God is at work in the hearts of children but for those of you have any contact with kids you know that the evidence is so rarely visible that it really makes one wonder what exactly they're catching. I've been doing a study of 1 Samuel and have been so incredibly blessed by the reality of who God is in my personal life so I have not questioned that I am where God wants me but I still so desperately needed some tangible proof that God was using me and today was that day!

Our senior pastor is constantly coming up with great ideas to involve our children (which makes my job so much easier) and his wonderful wife has committed herself to various sundays of assistance in the children's program. Together their desire to see growth in our children has blessed me in ways they will never know...today as Pastor Tim preached on the passage of scripture where Jesus washed the feet of his disciples and how he calls us to "wash the feet of those around us" I was struck by how so many of us do just that but how we could do it so much better.

At the closing of his sermon he asked for a few minutes of quiet and I ran downstairs to get the kids (kindergarten to grade 5), as I had been asked to do. The children came upstairs quietly and walked to the front of the sanctuary to observe on the floor. Although they had not participated in the service I could see their eager, curious stares as Pastor Tim asked 6 youth to come to the front and sit down in the seats set up at the front and put their feet into the basins. He then asked for 6 individuals, who felt led, to come and wash the feet of these youth. I could feel the emotion welling in me as people started to come forward. At this point I knew tears would fall, not just from me but from many people, men and women, who were feeling the presence of the Holy Spirit in that moment. The kids watched with attention and curiousity...one precious kindergarten girl, leaned to me and asked, "why is it just the adults who get to do this?". I offered for her to come with me and wash someone's feet and in turn have her feet washed but she shied away a bit and shook her head. I let it be and saw that few of the older boys were getting a bit antsy, but it wasn't that they wanted to go play...they wanted a turn.

I was moved as the children began scooting forward, eager to participate and trying to overcome their hesitation, uncertain if they were really "allowed" to be a part of this beautiful ritual. I sobbed, tears that I can't really identify, they weren't sadness or joy or relief, it was more of such an overwhelming feeling of God's presence that I didn't really know what else to do. I felt affirmed as my feet were washed (not just with the water but with tears of friendship, love, prayer and heartfelt appreciation) and in that moment the uncertainty of where I am at, was lifted. Then I had the privilege of helping the children as they began to come forward. I washed a pair of feet...I helped as the kindergarten girl, who wasn't certain before, brought her friend forward and asked if they could wash each other's feet. The children giggled but weren't silly...they were moved and in their child-like faith laughed as I'm sure our Father did as He watched these precious little beings worship Him. Siblings began washing feet, mothers were washing the feet of their children and vice versa. I saw grown men swipe tears away from their eyes and others smile with such victory at this simple gesture of love towards their fellow congregants. I was humbled by the expression that this simple ritual was to so many people.

As the service came to a close and I sat at the front listening to the beautiful music I sat with another sweet girl, she is the child of one of my closest friends...I've known her since she was 4 and hope to know her for many, many more years. I have been blessed to walk with her mother through the many trials that parenting brings, giving and taking wisdom as God allow us to share it with each other. As with any parent, I know there have been times of pure frustration in parenting this special child but as she sat with me, tears were streaming down her face and she looked up at me and said, "this is so cool"! Again I felt the hand of God placed on my life for that moment in time. I hugged her close and felt such a great joy at the family that I have been blessed with. An immediate family, including a husband who shares my faith, an extended family with a heritage of faith and the family of Christ that will one day reach my children as this particular day reached this child's heart. I asked her if I could pray with her and she enthusiastically nodded her head. I can honestly say that the words were not my own...the Holy Spirit was with me as I spoke over her and called on Him to bring clarity to who she is, understanding of the gifts He's given her and protection over her life.

It was such a great morning of reminding for me the power that the Holy Spirit has. It's not about me...it's not about what I can accomplish...it's about being obedient to the call He has placed on my life in this moment of time. To know that when I feel tired, He is strong...when I feel overwhelmed, He is in control...when I feel uncertain, He has a plan. Although, as our pastor pointed out, our culture really doesn't require the washing of feet, the metaphor can so easily have been transplanted for today's society. It means putting aside your own needs and desires to meet those of others and "wrapping the towel around your waist" to serve others.

Thank you Lord, for this day that You have made. Let me rejoice and be glad in it!

Long Time!

2010-12-16T18:09:00.000-08:00

Life gets busy, Christmas is nearly upon us and in this moment I think I'm content! I have no other feelings or words to describe where I'm at. There isn't anything significant that needs to be included in this blog...no big changes occurring in our lives, just living:)

James is more than happy at his new job and to see him love what he's doing, come home with a smile on his face and hear his energy left to share with his children is so incredibly refreshing and such a blessing to us as the road we've travelled to get here seems long. Don't get me wrong there are many others who have journeyed much, MUCH more difficult trials than us but when you live it, the trial is all consuming and sucks the life right out of you. To be in a place of contentment and rest just illuminates the place you've come from. I can honestly say that God has blessed my husband's commitment and stick-to-itiveness (not a work I realize, but I'm sure you all get the meaning).

I enjoy what I do. It can be overwhelming at times living the life of working mom...I admire women who do it fulltime or, even more so, single moms who work and are both mom and dad. I find I have to consciously take off my work hat and put on my "mom" hat...on the days I don't work the kids need me to focus on them and take time to just be with them. All in all I wouldn't change a thing but I do have to keep perspective and continue to ask God for strength and wisdom.

The kids are all doing relatively well. The odd situation arises here and there as is the case in any household and parenting is hardwork but in most cases tremendously rewarding. As I watch my friends and see how we all strive to raise "good" children... I appreciate that God has given us all such individuality. Each household raises their kids so differently but watching such amazing children emerge is a testament to the spirit in which God created us...each unique and individual with different ideas, opinions and viewpoints. These continue in the generation that follows us and as parents, aunts, uncles, grandparents, great-grandparents we get to contribute to the molding these little beings. Such an immense blessing...I think that's where I find it the most daunting...knowing that what I do does make a difference and I KNOW that I DO NOT always do it right. That's why I cling to God's grace.

I think if I were to try to use one word to encapsulate this period of my life I would definitely use the word GRACE! Grace for my mistakes, grace in providing for our needs above and beyond, grace for my impatience, etc. the list goes on of course but most importantly I feel a sense of presence, God's presence that just gives me peace. I am learning not to worry, learning to let go, learning to allow who He is to literally surround who I am in turn, pour out of me. I'm sure to some I am desperately lacking but even in this I am learning to just concern myself with what God thinks. It's a freeing concept (my girlfriends are laughing at this word because of a previous conversation we've had, sorry about the inside joke, but I mean this in the spiritual sense, ladies). It's allowing to mull spiritual questions, have deep conversations with God alone and although I seek council of wise, respected individuals I need less and less approval of others and find more joy in just being.

I've digressed a great deal so I should probably sign-off but for those who are still checking my blog occasionally, I'm still here just not necessarily making it a priority to blog. Thanks for reading and as always I value any insight you might have ir thoughts you might like to share:)

Nothing...Ramblings...Truth

2010-11-23T13:51:00.000-08:00

I really didn't have anything particular on my mind but the thought that it's been awhile since I posted anything on my blog! At the moment I'm sitting at my desk at work contemplating a few ideas I have and wondering if any of them will fly. I'm curious to know if any of the children I work with are grasping the word God has for them...I'm thankful for the people in the church who care enough to share their time with these kids each Sunday morning...I'm glad for friends in my personal life who hold me accountable and allow me to share my heart with them...I'm hoping to hear God's voice in the midst of all these thoughts and remain quiet enough to distinguish it from the rest of the "chatter" in my brain.

I've been reading 1 Samuel! Not everyday, as I probably should, but consistently. I am awed at God...I am inspired by the reality of Samuel's experience in hearing his Father...I admire David's graciousness to Saul and his trust in God's provision...I wish I could just BE, more like them rather than constantly trying to think up new ways to change my habits to emulate them.

I had a moment of truth last night with my oldest. We've been reading a christian novel written for kids by Frank Peretti. It's a mystery and in the end it turns out that there was "evil" at work. An ancient vault was about to be unlocked releasing demons...I know, you might wonder why on earth I would be reading a book like that to my nine-year-old. In truth, I didn't actually prescreen the book I just assumed that a novel by Frank Peretti would be acceptable material for him to read, especially if it was written for kids. In fact, it created a unique opportunity for me to share with Sam some of the basic beliefs of my faith. The word demons appeared and I realized he'd likely never understood the worD before so I asked him? He was baffled so I began to explain to him how God uses angels as part of His protection over us but that Satan has "warriors" as well that cannot hurt those who are under God's protection but they will try. He understood but asked me not to use the word demons as it was a "gross" word (funny how without knowing the meaning of the word he instinctively knew it was a word that just doesn't sit right). Then he paused and asked if they were real. My initial response was to try to downplay the power Satan has but I realized that God had opened a door for me to share the reality of our world and the strength of His power with a child who is getting old enough to understand it. Truthfully, I wanted to pretend he was but a little boy, not grown enough to grasp the depths of faith and young enough to protect from the reality of our harsh world but in recent days God has challenged me to begin letting go and allowing my son to grow up. This was a moment of faith for me as I trusted that God would protect Sam's mind and heart from the deep fear that Satan has often whispered in my ear at the thought of his power. It was a moment to share with my child that God is greater than anything. It was a moment to live what I've been contemplating in listening to one of my new favorite songs by Chris August, Starry Night:

I'm giving my life to the only one who makes the Moon reflect the sun.
Every Starry Night, that was His design.
I'm giving my life to the only son, who was and is and yet to come
Let the praises ring, 'cause he is everything
'Cause he is everything

God is everything. He is our Creator, our ABBA Father, who has given us life. We often marvel at the creations of man, the architectural genius of human hands, but rarely do we take time to recognize that what we live in has been created with nothing more than a word. He can create and He can destroy. Most important in this situation was not downplaying the power Satan holds in this world but creating the understanding that God has destroyed the stronghold Satan is allowed in our lives. That we merely speak His name, that a word from our lips can bring the power of Heaven and Earth to our hearts.

Like I said, so many thoughts clutter my mind! I am trying to sift through and keep my mind clear for the sound of my Beloved's voice.

A few random sayings

2010-11-15T11:00:00.000-08:00

I just wanted to keep record of a few funny things that have happened in our home the last few days and what better place to do that then to share it with a few of my friends as well.

It should be no surprise to anyone who knows Lanae that she has very set ideas on when it will be appropriate for her to kiss a boy. She has already determined that she doesn't kiss anyone on the lips unless she's married to them, and that includes me! It's funny and strange all at the same time and I have it in my mind to remind her of that when she turns 14 or 15 and wants to start kissing boys. The other day we were reading a story of Cinderella and she was quite interested in if they got married at the end or not. They didn't because it wasn't the original Cinderella but I commented on how she would love to plan her wedding and that she would hopefully get a wonderful man whom she could kiss once she got married. She proceeded to inform me that she would not let him kiss her on the lips but that she would let him kiss her on the hand IF she was wearing her glove. Such a funny comment but again a reminder of how determined and adamant she can be about ideas she gets in her head.

Another great moment this past week was our experience deciding whether or not to register Jake for dance class. Jake has always been an extremely rhythmic person so it hasn't been hard coming to grips with his excitement for a dance class. We took him to a jazz/musical theater class to try but determined that because it was all girls he would eventually not appreciate that dynamic. We thought it might be a good idea to try the hip hop class that followed for a few minutes. A few minutes turned into the entire class and 2 hours later Jake had successfully completed two full classes. He came home exuberant about the Christmas performance and adamant that he wanted to take the hip hop class. Later that evening he informed me that he really liked his instructor. He said, "Miss Marissa, has the best skin to touch mom because it's so warm!" Ahh, that's my Jakie, a lover to the core. Needless to say dance/dramatic arts will be a success with my second son and I'm sure he will excel in it just as Sam has excelled in football.

Another Daughter to Celebrate

2010-11-12T11:00:00.000-08:00

Friday, November 5th was another great day to celebrate another beautiful child in our home. Lanae is an interesting girl...she is bright, she communicates her desires and needs very clearly but above all she is determined and knows her own mind. I am always shocked at her ability to explain things to me and her perception of a situation.

Although I'm quite certain that her and I will quite often disagree on a variety of issues I am 100% aware of the fact that my love for her and who God has created her to be will remain unscathed. She is a treasure in our family and I know God has great things in mind for her.

This year has opened a great number of opportunities for her. She is attending preschool this year and thoroughly enjoying the social aspect that it awards her. We also had the opportunity to attend her first fieldtrip to the local pumpkin patch. We didn't get much into the Fall festivities this year as it's been an extremely busy fall so I was quite glad at this opportunity to go with her class and enjoy the usual fall activities.

Lanae is also a very family oriented person, as are all of our kids, which is definitely a direct result of having both sides of our family living in the same city or at least within a very short distance of us. So she was thrilled when her Uncle Joel and Auntie Meghan got themselves a kitten. Her name is Lily and since spending time with her Lanae is quite certain that we need to get a cat as well and name her Lily.

Lanae's actual birthday wasn't necessarily anything elaborate but we did give her the gift we got for her that I found on a local swap site. She loved the little baby doll bed with a canopy and her "talking" baby doll to go with it. I know she's going to be so much fun as she grows up and I only hope I can keep up with her passion and drive.

Aquarium

2010-11-09T11:00:00.000-08:00

The last time we had a visit to the aquarium Jake was about the same age Annie is now. I loved seeing the reactions of the boys to the many aquatic displays and just enjoying time as a family in a new environment.

This time was a little different because we had all four of the kids and we ventured there with all of James' family as well. It was a great experience and what I think I enjoyed the most was the trek in as James' reminisced a bit about his childhood. James' Nana used to live in North Vancouver and he told us that his family, of 5, would often make the trek out after church on Sunday for a visit. He took the route they traveled and showed us the general area where she lived. Then off for an afternoon of observation.

Something about trips like this bring us together. I think it has to do with God's creation and the beauty about it that intrigues us and allows us to enjoy the experience together. The kids were eager and I'm quite certain liked all they saw.

Watching the dolphins was probably the highlight for us. They are such a beautiful animal and incredibly smart. The kids were enthralled with their performance and I was again reminded of the majesty of creation around us and the little I actually know about the many amazing things in the world around me.

I also really like jellyfish. I'm not exactly sure what it is about this display that I like but I think it's the color of the tank water and the florescent creatures that can be potentially dangerous.

These last two pictures just reminded me of why people get these crazy stories of "swamp" monsters and undersea creatures that turn into blown out of proportion myths that go on for years and years.

We stopped for dinner on the way back at a place James and his family often ate. I'd been there once before and although I still don't understand the appeal I can appreciate the sentimental attachment they have to a place where many fond memories remain. The kids were quiet on the way back and the three youngest were asleep before we reached the bridge.

Missed Blog

2010-11-06T21:39:00.000-07:00

So at this moment my brain is far from putting into words some of the thoughts that are in my head but it's been awhile and I have missed a few important events in our home so I'm going to try to get his on record while I have a few quiet moments:)

October 15th was a good day to celebrate a precious little lady in our home. Annie was not unlike her sister, in that she was in a hurry to make it into this work as well. It's funny how details of a child's birth seem to mimic a bit of their personality in years to come. Annie is a sweet little girl, with a vibrant personality. She's not always in a hurry to do things but she is determined to do them her own way. So many people comment on how cute she is and her personality definitely shines through in almost every situation. She is quick to smile and very affectionate. She loves her brothers and wants to do pretty much anything Lanae does. She is my snuggle bunny and I am so thankful that she enjoys quiet times of just sitting in my lap. She loves to chat and already uses her many words to make sure she gets her point across.

I love having this sweet child as my baby and know that she will be a delight in my life for years to come.

Fall Fun

2010-10-14T23:00:00.000-07:00

Since my wonderful husband has decided to purchase us both a new iPhone I am back on track with taking photos. Of course, they are not quite as good as with a real camera but they definitely capture the memories I want to have of time spent with my kids.

The many faces of my sweet youngest girl! Monday mornings I get to spend a few hours with just her and we have a blast just hanging out or heading on a few random errands (errands that I would not dare do with all four of my kids).

Annie had her very first dentist appointment. It was so cute watching her put on the glasses like her older brothers and sister and open her mouth wide for the dentist. She did so well even though she didn't actually get to have her teeth cleaned in the end.

Of course who can resist a cute little girl in her undies and yellow rain boots. Too cute!

A short jaunt to the zoo. James called me a few weeks ago desperate for a family shot for his a project at work. We ended up heading out with three of the four kids to have a picture taken for one of the product boxes. James, Sam and Lanae and I got in on the photo and then on the way out we took a look at the animals that we hadn't seen for quite awhile. The shoot was at the Vancouver Zoo!

Our Thanksgiving weekend involved a great deal of sports, as is the norm for our family. We ended up watching Sam play a great football game, scoring 5 of 5 conversion kicks. Then James opted to join my three brothers in a game of recreational rugby. Two things are wrong with that last sentence, first my husband has never played rugby in his life and that is really kind of dangerous, second there is no such thing as recreational rugby. The sport is intense, rough and crazy weird. Regardless James opted to join them again on Sunday and despite one nasty bruise and a few sore muscles he actually enjoyed himself. All in all it was a great weekend spent relaxing with family and eating a lot of very good food.

A walk on the river finished up our weekend. The day started with a nice, relaxing morning and not much to accomplish. A playdate for Jake, pajamas for the rest of us and then a walk with my parents along the Fraser River. It got a little chilly and the raindrops came sporadically but we enjoyed ourselves and the kids loved hanging out with their grandparents. Annie specifically loves her gama and gampa (although she usually calls him gama too) but all the kids enjoyed just being together.

Fun, Fun, Fun

2010-10-13T22:20:00.000-07:00

This wonderful job of parenting continues to be a great experience, as I'm sure God intended it to be. I said to my mom this morning, "why is it that my children can't just get themselves together and be good all at the same time and bad all at the same time??". I know it doesn't actually work like that but it sure would be nice.

Anyway, Jake is such a great kid but a boundary pusher all the way. He's fun and quirky, crazy, silly and loves to make people laugh but such a basketcase of emotions. Last year I blogged about how he had gotten in trouble at school for peeing on the playground. In that same year he had to have a "chat" with the principal because he was misbehaving in class. Sam was mortified that his younger brother had already gotten sent to the principal's office in Kindergarten and Sam was in grade 3 and had so far managed to avoid that horrendous experience. Yesterday, Jake came home declaring that he had been sent to the back of the line and had to have his picture taken last because he was goofing off. Then as the story progressed I find he'd had another "chat" with our wonderful principal (this time because she was watching said behaviour and managed to step in before it got too much more crazy). Then today his teacher called me into class at the end of the day saying Jake had been spoken to on the playground for a game he was playing with his friends. The game in and of itself was not the issue but the lack of obedience that ensued was a problem. Then in class the teacher had to separate him from the class and Jake thought it would be appropriate to tell his teacher that was exactly what he wanted.

Now before I go further with my thoughts, I have to interject to say what an amazing freedom I felt walking into that classroom with no guilt as a parent. I know it's my job to rear my children in a way that glorifies God but I also know that as our children begin to grow they have to learn to take responsibility for their actions. I appreciated the sense of grace I felt in knowing that I am a good parent. I make mistakes, I do have times of immense guilt but in this situation I felt secure in the knowledge that my children will make mistakes too and that does not always reflect negatively on who I am as a parent or as a person.

Anyway, I can be very thankful for the fact that both of my children have wonderful teachers and as a result Jake's was very understanding of him and encouraged him to come back tomorrow with the Jake she "knows and loves". It was an encouraging encounter and I know that as James and I trust and rely on God's strength to raise our children He will give us wisdom and guidance in how best to accomplish this job well!

Thinking, Thinking, Thinking...

2010-09-28T16:09:00.000-07:00

Am I the only one who gets herself into situations where I begin thinking so deeply that my brain begins to hurt and then I wonder why on earth I would subject myself to that?? If truth be told, I much prefer a child-like faith. I've said that before on my blog, that I often live my faith in a manner more comparable to a child than a "mature" grown-up. It's not to say that my faith is immature but often I find myself saying, "if I think about that really long and hard will it truly change what I believe about God to the point that I don't believe anymore?" If the answer is, unlikely, than I don't know why I would bother taking time to think about it beyond a passing moment. Again, I'll clarify that I do ask myself who God is to me, what he's done in my life and how my faith has changed over the years. I see it becoming deeper but not necessarily more theological.

HOWEVER, I can say that I am enjoying the banter that happens at the sessions I've been taking. We did the third of four sessions last night and even though I had little to contribute verbally, my mind was racing through many different thoughts. Two things that have struck me and I hope continue to impact my daily spiritual living are this:

1.) When I worry about what other people think of me I am not engaging my faith! This can be challenging for most people but some of us struggle more than others to be liked. I have always wanted to be well-liked by everyone. For the most part I don't think it's been a detriment to my relationship with Christ, in fact I do think that my flexibility and easy-going personality has allowed me to be more moldable to Christ's will than anything. However, I know that often times I do worry about what other people think of me. I get a knot in my stomach when I think something is amiss in a situation between my family or with my friends and I immediately want to fix it. I get upset and obsess when I perceive that someone might be upset with me. This new tidbit of knowledge has caused me to rethink when I should feel this sense of upheaval and what it boils down to is that if I think I am doing something that would displease God, then and only then should I feel the pit of despair in my gut.

2.) I think this is a greek or latin phrase (I could google it but I'm on a roll here so I don't want to stop) that goes like this: "Coram Deo". It means "in the face of God", which essentially reminds us that everything we do is before God or in response to God. I love this because what it gave me was a vivid picture of everything I do! Everytime I get angry with my children, I'm getting angry in God's presence. Everytime I speak in a sarcastic, disrespectful tone to my husband, I'm speaking that way in God's presence. Everytime I choose wrongly, I do so in God's presence. I know I've heard it before about how God is with us everywhere and walking beside us. I've heard the term "practising God's presence" but this was so different because what I felt was not someone who was just merely there but God himself standing beside me. Like a real, life friend standing there shaking my shoulders, gently, trying to remind me that berating my child will not make him change his ways, holding my shoulders and comforting me when sorrow fills my heart, speaking words of tenderness and love when I'm frustrated at how my marriage looks at a particular moment. And at the same time looking down on me with a glowing sense of pride and love for this creation that is so imperfect and yet so beautiful to Him.

For some of you this might be old news. I've felt that too. I think God teaches us all different things at different times. Something you may have learned already is completely new to me and something I may have learned years ago is like a lightening bold of revelation to you. But that, my friends, is why I LOVE living in community and fellowship with other believers, because we are all a work in progress at various stage of development and each one of us can teach each other something new.

So to my dear friends if you see that I am slightly different (which I hope is true) it's because I'm living Coram Deo and only to please Him, who has made me, and not man, who could break me!

Wondering...

2010-09-14T18:21:00.001-07:00

I'm going to attempt something most people would find absurd...blogging while the kids are still awake!!! I know, I know it's kind of silly to try but when you feel like you need to just sit down with a cup of tea and write or you might explode it's probably best to oblige;)

Last night I was privileged to attend the first of four sessions that are meant to help me "dig deeper" in my faith and really think beyond the confines of what I've been taught for the past 30 years. Not that there is anything wrong with what I've been taught but as one of the attendees said, "you can never learn TOO MUCH about God"! Isn't it true? Isn't it amazing that with the small percentage of knowledge we accumulate in our lifetime we don't even come close to matching the knowledge of God. If I ever have the opportunity to share my blog with those who are not Christ-followers I hope that in this post they see how there is so much that "christians" do not know. We claim to have a lot of inside information but really when you start thinking about it, how much do we really know? We still have a lot of unanswered questions.

The one example that really hit me is found in 1 Corinthians 9&10. It talks about no eye has seen and no ears have heard...but most importantly it says how "no mind can conceive" what He has prepared for us. I think I've read that verse more than a dozen times in my life and yet the enormity of that thought just hit a nerve. The truth of the matter is that not even one person here on earth could begin to understand or "conceive" what else there is for us.

If truth be told the evening was a little overwhelming. Despite the fact that it was facilitated by someone whom I deeply respect, it was so much to digest in such a short period of time. I think there were a few times that my brain literally took a leave of absence. But it felt good to exercise my brain and begin thinking outside the proverbial box! I am looking forward to the rest of our interactions as a group and what these new people have to offer my spiritual journey.

Letting go...bit by bit

2010-09-09T23:15:00.000-07:00

I should be going to bed! I was snappy with my husband and am tired from an early morning but I'm finding that the peace and quiet of everyone sleeping is a bit alluring. It's rare in my house that everything is quiet for more than five minutes. Sure there are times that I am pleasantly surprised by all four of my children reading on the couch to themselves or each occupied with a quiet activity in various, DIFFERENT rooms, but the knowledge that I will not be interrupted, tonight, for several hours is definitely a bit intoxicating.

Anyway, on to the reason that I wanted to post.

The other day I went ahead and did two things...#1. I enrolled my oldest daughter in preschool and #2. I took another step to life outside of mommyhood in my career. My friends know that I have made little secret of my intense desire to allow my own development even as I encourage my children's. My good friends share that passion with me and for that I cherish them even more. They encourage me as I seek beyond this all-encompassing role of motherhood and push me to see what else God has in store.

As a wave of reality washed over me the tears started to fall. I began afresh, to realize just how short this stage of life is and how soon the bit by bit will be complete release. The tiny steps of freedom I feel I am giving my children now will soon turn me in an about face when the years I thought would never come have slipped away so quickly and quietly I know I will feel I almost missed them. I gave myself the freedom to mourn the loss of the sweet baby snuggles I once gave my precious daughter. Those snuggles that have now turned into quick hugs in the doorway of the school as I leave her in the care of others. I know that I could keep her home for another year, shelter her from the fast moving world around her, but she is ready to begin exploring that world and finding out who she is. She's ready to open her heart to new friends and share a little of what her world has been up until this moment. As I let go a teeny, tiny bit I trust that it is not really letting go of her into the world but letting go of her into the arms of a loving God who will protect her because He loves her beyond my greatest moments of motherly love.

As I contemplated that I realized where that left me. At home for two mornings a week with MY BABY! Just me and this sweet last child that will one day follow her sister out the door. I didn't for a moment wish that I had more children to come but I recognized that the years of saying, "I only have 'x' amount of years until I have to decide what I want to do with my life," have finally arrived. I can no longer push off the decisions of what I want to do when I grow up, I've arrived...I'm a grown up with dreams still unmet, goals still to attain and a whole lot of years left to live.

For the moment I will, of course, enjoy those quiet hours of my sweet youngest child and cherish this time I have with her. I will endeavor to play, sing, be silly, and love on her as much as possible to allow her the attention she sometimes lacks with a houseful of attention-seekers. I will focus on being the best mom possible for the other three munchkins when they arrive home tired, overwhelmed and zoned out from a long day of instruction. I will not regret the mistakes I've made along the way but trust that God will use each and every one of them as a reminder that I must rely on Him for my daily strength.

And then I will continue to walk the path He has set for me as Elise, just Elise, not mom, not wife, not daughter, not sister, not friend but Elise Susanne. The one He gave dreams of teaching, dreams of traveling, dreams of drawing closer to Him each day. I know that discovering that will help me be better at all the roles in my life but most importantly it will help me see that He has a great purpose for my life that must be filled as a servant to Him first and foremost.

A rainy afternoon!

2010-09-06T13:58:00.000-07:00

Some would say that rainy afternoons are so frustrating and depressing, especially at the end of summer. I would agree some days but other times I find the drizzle leads to a quiet, relaxed afternoon. Today is definitely one of those.

We did brave the weather this morning to spend two hours on the sidelines of the football field cheering Sam's team on. Most of you know that Sam is an avid athlete and that he has tried his hand at football before. The first year he played he was 7, they practiced three times a week for three months and then for the season (which is 2-3 months long) they practiced twice a week and played one game a week. We were ALL overwhelmed to say the least. Sam was done by the end of the season and a little disillusioned with the prospect of doing that again. As his parents we felt he needed the freedom to choose his sport and as a result he decided he wanted to take a break from sport for the following fall. We agreed but with the knowledge that he would take up some sport again fall of this year. Originally we registered him for roller hockey with a group of several good friends. Unfortunately the amount of interest was limited and was therefore cancelled. We briefly discussed other options and Sam came to the conclusion that football was the best opportunity for him. He did miss most of the preseason conditioning which is good and bad...good because it's a lot for these young boys but unfortunate because he would have to accept that he would likely not play much the first part of the season to "earn" his spot on the team!

Fast-foward to Saturday...Sam has transitioned to offensive line (not exactly sure what you would call his position but it's basically a running back) and kicker. His first game of the season he managed to kick 5 of 6 conversion kicks (for those who are not football savvy this is a kick through the uprights after a touchdown) which in this league are scored at 2 points each because it's apparently more difficult than running a conversion through the endzone. Then this morning he managed 7 of 8 conversion kicks AND he scored a touchdown. Most of my friends know that I'm not a loud, aggressive mom, although I do cheer for him and the rest of his teammates, mostly I sit back and watch as many other parents wonder who this kid is! I thoroughly enjoyed sitting on the sidelines hearing comments about the abilities of my son (all of which have been gifted to him from our amazing Creator). My heart is filled with pride (not the kind that leads to our downfall, but the kind I imagine my God feels for me when I achieve great things that he created me for) as I watch him work hard to do his best and have fun. However, what I feel the most inspiration from is seeing him walk of the field without pretense or boastfulness. His main concern being welcoming his many supporters (namely me, his siblings, his grandparents and a variety of uncles and aunts that manage to attend) and thanking them for coming. It doesn't always come out in so many words but always in the attitude he displays after his game. I know that pridefulness can creep in at any moment and I do not pretend to assume that we will never have to deal with this but I do appreciate that at least we have a foundation to work from. That his heart is not already full of boastfulness and pride will hopefully make our job, as his parents, that much easier as we seek to fulfill the desire of our hearts to raise godly, humble children whom achieve because they know they want to do their best and use the skills they've been given in an honorable manner!

Here are a few pictures taken by one of the other football moms of Sam doing what he does.

Discipline versus Consequences

2010-08-27T20:38:00.000-07:00

I know it's been so long since I've updated my blog but we've been busy with summer! Taking holidays, doing day trips and just generally enjoying the freedom summer brings from the regular routine of life.

Now that's not to say that we abandon the required aspects of everyday living...it just means it looks different than what it normally would. In an effort to refresh some of my parenting and endeavor to continue teaching my children the important aspects of our faith, James and I have incorporated some new material. We're not rigid about it or even daily in our interaction with it but we try to find some time a few times in the week to engage and discuss some of the curriculum provided. If you're interested check out www.kidsofintegrity.com

Anyway, we've done some bible memory and some scripture reading as well as interactive stories and behavior enforcing activities. I think that because we aren't rigid about it the kids really enjoy it. What I really appreciate is seeing how different my children are through these activities. For example, Jake is completely amazing at the memorization of passages. He gets them within a day and remembers them almost as soon as I ask him to repeat it. On the other hand, Sam has a difficult time remembering the verses but gets them with some significant practise but he is definitely interested in discussing some of the scripture reading and what it means.

Tonight after we'd gone over our memory verse and then read a passage of scripture Sam started talking about a conversation he'd had with a friend. Over the last few days we've had to revisit some of the attitude issues and comments he's made have led to interesting ideas of what heaven might be like. After a particularly difficult run-in that we had he was certain that he would rather be finished with his life here on earth and get straight to heaven. I informed him that although heaven will be great there is still consequence to his bad choices here on earth once he gets to heaven. In the moment that was lost on him and of course he didn't believe me but tonight the comment came back and discussion ensued. "What do you mean there will be a consequence in heaven, so and so says there are no consequences in heaven". Of course our earthly idea of consequence doesn't begin to encapsulate what that looks like but it occurred to me that perhaps I had mislead him or that I had misused a word or two in the english language. So I began to try to find passages that would help explain what I meant.

Eventually I believe I got my point across. On earth, as parents, James and I discipline for wrong choices as well as the fact that there are natural consequences for wrong choices. However there is a reality that we will be judged for our wrong choices made on earth by a gracious, yet all-knowing God once we reach the mercy seat. It is clear to me in many of the passages that I've read over the last while that living righteously is rewarded in some capacity while living contrary to God's word is met with some sort of consequence. I would never presume to know what those consequences are but I have no doubt that they will apply in some capacity. The conversation was very positive and I was grateful to see that Sam has clearly begun thinking through many of these ideas on his own. It gives me hope that we are doing something right when our children begin weighing the comments we make and asking questions about what they mean.

Being Anxious and Trusting God

2010-07-16T21:42:00.000-07:00

It's such a conundrum being a Jesus-follower. I want to live my faith, I want to trust God's will, I want to follow His word but everyday my humanity paralyzes me from doing so. I think, what if He gives me what I pray for, what if I ask Him for an opportunity to live out my faith and He presents it and I fail! God is gracious...I know that, but graciousness has to have limits and when I ask for something and He gives it and then I ignore it how could He possibly continue to extend grace. Maybe this makes sense to you, maybe it doesn't but as I continue to read the bible in combination with "Irresistable Revolution" I find myself hesitating to pray for an opportunity to live the life of such amazing sacrifice because I know it has many more implications for the long-run than just feeling good because I gave something to someone in need.

Today I read 2 Corinthians 9. I didn't actually check if it was in my scheduled reading but I figured I'd just go with whatever chapter was next after my last reading (it actually was purely laziness in not wanting to trek up the stairs to get my daily reading pamphlet). What was more funny though was that in my laziness God spoke to me..."12. For if the willingness is there, the gift is acceptable according to what one has, not according to what he does not have. 13. Our desire is not that others might be relieved while you are hard pressed, but that there might be equality. 14. At the present time your plenty will supply what they need, so that in turn their plenty will supply what they need. Then there will be equality." Powerful hey??? Paul was extolling the Corinthian church for their generosity despite their poverty. Honoring their sacrifice for the love of God and each other. What if we did that. What if just our one lowly town decided that for even a week we could sacrifice a portion of the immense wealth we have to assure that every homeless, starving person on our streets could eat, dress, sleep properly. Could you imagine the effect that would have? It's crazy cool to imagine but a whole other thing to live out right?

Here are a few more challenges I saw over the week from Claiborne's book:

"I had come to see that the great tragedy in the church is not that rich Christians do not care about the poor but that rich Christians do not know the poor." (p. 113)

"Many spiritual seekers have not been able to hear the words of Christians because the lives of Christians have been making so much horrible noise. It can be hard to hear the gentle whisper of the Spirit amid the noise of Christendom." (p.127)

"I heard one gospel preacher say it like this, as he really wound up and broke a sweat: 'We've got the unite ourselves as one body. Because Jesus is coming back, and he's coming back for a bride, not a harem.'" (p. 145)

For even if the whole world believed in resurrection, little would change until we began to practise it." (p. 150)

"I'm convinced that God did not mess up and make too many people and not enough stuff. Poverty was not created by God but by you and me, because we have not learned to love our neighbors as ourselves." (p. 169-170)

So much truth in each little nugget of a statement. Do you see why I can feel the push to trust God and take the gigantic leap of actually living out this biblical truth of loving my neighbor as myself but at the same time feel my heart's thunderous beat in anxiety over what might come of that? I know God is great, I know He is merciful, I know He will supply for me even as He takes care of the birds of the air and lilies of the field. But then I hear the booming voice of my greatest enemy, my own doubt, telling me..."but what if He isn't and doesn't".

A little "light" reading...

2010-07-12T21:00:00.000-07:00

So I'm reading this amazing book that was recommended to me by a co-worker! I think it's funny actually because I've always been more of a fiction reader but in the last year or so I've picked up more than a few non-fiction books and actually finished them.

This one is definitely a little more challenging as far as what I'm going to choose to do with the conviction in my heart to actually follow through with some of the points the author is trying to make. What I love most about this book is the no nonsense approach he has and the truth he speaks. He refers to scripture accurately and asks many of the questions I believe our generation has been thinking for some time now but feel intimidated to ask. His heart is the heart of all Christ-followers who yearn for something more but fear seeking it out and what it will mean. His style of writing is unique in that it's challenging without holding a tone of condemnation or judgement, as many authors tend to do. He makes me want to seek what God is doing and take part in it and affirms a few ideas that have been purcolating in my mind over the last few months.

I haven't finished it yet but here are a few snippets that have made me think and laugh all at the same time:

"I've seen people gather around and lay hands on the sick. Others anoint people with oil. But when Jesus wants to heal a blind guy, he picks up some dirt off the ground, spits in it, and then wipes it on the dude's eyes (John 9:6). That's weird. No one else did that. Can you imagine the other religious leaders? 'Rabbi, could you hack me up a holy loogie?'" (p.40)

"Rich [Mullins] stood up in chapel and said, 'You guys are all into that born again thing, which is great. We do need to be born again, since Jesus said that to a guy named Nicodemus. But if you tell me I have to be born again to enter the kingdom of God, I can tell you that you have to sell everything you have and give it to the poor, because Jesus said that to a guy too...But I guess that's why God invented highlighters, so we can highlight the parts we like and ignore the rest.'" (p. 98-99)

The last comment I'll share really did strike the deepest nerve for me in my "comfort" level and the sacrifice my Savior has made for me.

"True, the cross is not always seeker sensitive. It is not comfortable. But it is the cornerstone of our faith, and I fear that when we remove the cross, we remove the central symbol of the nonviolence and grace of our Lover. If we remove the cross, we are in danger of promoting a very cheap grace. Perhaps it should make us uncomfortable. After all, it wasn't so comfy to get nailed there."

I'm sure I'll have a few more great quotes to share as I continue reading this book and being challenged. Just a side-note that I have tried to be diligent in picking up the bible first and doing some "straight from the source" reading before returning to this latest find and I'm consistently amazed and inspired that God honors that with words that I need to hear or thoughts that I can journal and reflect on how my life is changing and maturing.

If you want some inspiration for yourself and would rather read everything in context I really encourage you to pick this up and delve into it. It's called "Irresistable Revolution" by Shane Clairborne. It's published by Zondervan and copyrighted 2006.

Peeing in the bush

2010-07-04T10:00:00.000-07:00

I'm pretty sure the face on the left says all it needs to say about why I would title a blog like this but I really have to share the dialogue of my almost six year old if for nothing else than to have a permanent record of it.

Jake had been having a few behavioral issues the last two weeks of school. Mostly just goofing around and being ready for the end of the school year. We have an incredibly understanding kindergarten teacher and she has walked both our boys through their first year of school with such grace and care but I have to say that if I had been in her position the last few days of school I would have found it difficult to display such composure as she when she informed me that my son had decided he couldn't wait to use the bathroom.

A boy in his class found him peeing in the bushes and decided to join him. Shortly after that a few classmates found him and "reported" his rather unsavory behavior to the teacher. Needless to say her first response was to get quite angry (rather reasonable if you ask me) but then she decided to talk to the boys and determine if this was behavior that was considered acceptable at home.

That conversation went something like this:

"Jake, are you allowed to pee in the trees at home," asks the teacher? "No, but sometimes I do and my mom doesn't know because there isn't anyone there to tell on me", he replies.

Of course he's informed that kids aren't allowed to pee in the bushes at school even if the teachers don't know about it and the message is relayed home that perhaps we should talk about it. Now we had conversed with Jake already that anymore unacceptable incidents at school would result in consequences at home but I wasn't really sure exactly what would be appropriate in this case. James was quick to the rescue suggesting he write a note apologizing and giving two good reasons why he shouldn't do that again. So here is what he wrote:

Mrs. Thiessen,

I am sorry that I was peeing in the trees. I know that pee belongs in the toilet and that someone could step in it. Please forgive me.

Jake

It was priceless and Mrs. T. was quite impressed with his neat printing, spacing and great spelling so she gladly accepted his apology.

Fast-forward to Tuesday afternoon after I picked the kids up from Nana's house. This is how the conversation went:

Me: "Jake, I talked to Mrs. Thiessen and she said you had a great day today. I am very proud of you that you gave her the letter and didn't have any problems today at school."

Jake: "It was a good day mom (Pause) well, there was one incident...I kicked a girl."

Me: "Jake, why would you do such a thing? That isn't very kind."

Jake: "I know mom, but she wanted to fight me."

Me: "What do you mean she wanted to fight you, why would she want to do that?"

Jake: "Well, she walked up to me and she JUST, looked like she wanted to fight so I kicked her."

At this point I'm trying not to laugh because really how can a parent not find it somewhat amusing when children are so matter-of-fact about their behavior. As a parent trying to raise healthy, well-behaved children it can be difficult to find the balance between letting kids be kids and experiencing natural consequences and setting boundaries that will help them establish the difference between right and wrong in their minds.

Really this was just a funny illustration of how teachable moments invade everyday of our lives as parents. We can choose to embrace them when our children are young and give them a good solid start or we can let them just "be kids" and flounder through many difficult trials as they head into adolescence.

Canada Day 2010

2010-07-02T21:31:00.000-07:00

Canada Day this year epitomized why I love my life. It was a day filled with fun, family, and friends.

We woke up bright and early to get out the door and reserve our usual spot to watch the parade. We ended up an hour early and with a good chunk of sidewalk reserved for a large group of our friends. The parade definitely left much to be desired, in fact I'm pretty sure there were only two or three really good floats this year but the kids still enjoyed it and hopefully for years to come they will remember the people we were spending time with rather than what the actual parade looked like.

The kids pretty much had someone special to hang out with throughout the day. Sam saw his friends, Evan and Caleb (which meant we only saw him for about five minutes all day), Jake hung out with his buddy Nolan a little later in the afternoon, Lanae had her two good friends Natalie and Monica and Annie was snuggling with me and Julie. There was definitely an abundance of good company. I, of course loved the many kidisms that were heard throughout the day and many good laughs with some of my best friends. I think James just enjoyed not working on a random day during the week and would take a break like that every week if he could.
Later in the evening after a BBQ at "the Tams" we headed to my parents house for pizza and chillaxin'. The kids needed to wind down and have some quiet time before we made them stay up until 11:00 watching mediocre fireworks. It was one of the best evenings with my family, although it was rather unfortunate to have some key people missing, but we really just talked and laughed and enjoyed being together. I have to say that as we get older there are so many more opportunities for that even though the amount of time together isn't as great it's definitely more quality. Anyway, the kids ALL enjoyed the fireworks. The only one I was slightly concerned about was Annie and she clapped her hands, danced and kept saying, "wow, that's pretty". Overall I was so proud of my kids for the good behavior and just being together with no major issues. It was definitely a day to be enjoyed.

A neat find

2010-06-25T14:19:00.001-07:00

I found the prayer below from a blog of an author that I've been reading lately. This prayer was written for her kids but as I read it I realized it's something I need to pray for myself before I can pray it for my children. So as I read it I changed the "you'll" to an "I'll". It was a just a neat reminder to me of how much I need my heavenly Father and that only once I've discovered that truth can I really begin passing it along to my children.

By Lisa T. Bergren

I pray you’ll get caught doing things wrong—before they get too big

I pray you’ll fail—in things that don’t matter

I pray you’ll have to say you’re sorry—and get really good at it, so that when the time’s right, you can always find the courage to say the words

I pray you’ll cry, really hard—so you feel free to express both tears of anguish and tears of joy

I pray you’ll sweat—and learn what it means to work really hard for something you want or to reach a goal or to cross a finish line

I pray you’ll get lost—and discover you have the Compass within to help you find your way

I pray you’ll get weary—enough to know that you can’t do everything on your own strength

I pray you’ll give up—and rely on God for your strength

I pray you’ll experience unanswered prayers—and discover deeper, wider trust

I pray you’ll feel foolish—and realize we’re all nothing, without Christ

I pray you’ll suffer heartbreak—and grow in the discovery of how your Creator can use all things for good

I pray you’ll be shattered—and be reborn in the Spirit

I pray you’ll be near-sighted—unable to see anything but God, right beside you

I pray you’ll be far-sighted—unable to see anything but God, right there on the horizon

I pray you’ll lose a job—and know that your Provider is ever present

I pray you’ll brush up against death—and recognize that this is not the end

I pray you’ll have to wait—and learn the value of patience

I pray you’ll be deaf—to all but the Father’s voice

I pray you’ll be scared—of living without God in your life

I pray you’ll take crazy risks—and dare to adventure where your Shepherd leads

Amen.

The big day!

2010-06-21T12:43:00.000-07:00

So it's taken me a bit to get this post up but I wanted to make sure I covered it here on my blog as it will always be a day to remember for a variety of reason! Some reasons I will gladly share here and others will be for the memory of those in attendance only.

Although I thought it a bit odd at first to have such a late wedding, in the end I thoroughly enjoyed having my day and then heading out for an evening of celebration. I didn't feel that I missed much in only sharing in Joel and Meghan's time through the night because we spent so much time together as family in the days preceding the wedding.

The days leading up to the wedding left much to be desired, weather-wise. It was overcast pretty much all three or four days before and many intermittent sprinkles. Needless to say we were all a bit nervous about what Saturday would bring us but God is good, all the time! We awoke to a beautifully, stunning sunny summer day...a day so warm and balmy that I managed to sport a sunburn on my left shoulder after sitting outside for a couple of hours in the afternoon watching Sam play baseball.

Around 3:30 I headed to Amber's house to meet-up with my sisters who were going to "beautify" me. Although I've never felt like I missed out on having sisters I did enjoy this opportunity and it made me realize that as adults we can now enjoy something we didn't have as children. Trish is the only one who had sisters growing up but for Meghan, Amber and I this is a new adventure and I think one we are all eagerly anticipating. After spending an hour curling hair, putting on make-up, accesorizing, and changing clothes we all headed to family pictures.

As is the case with most extended family photos it was a little chaotic. We were trying to photograph two separate families in a rather short period of time. We managed to get what we wanted though and after seeing some of the teasers from their actual wedding photos I'm pretty sure it will be impressive. Above are a few candid photos before the wedding.

The photographer got some good shots of our family, the gigantic mass of people that it is. A shot or two Joel, Meghan, mom and dad, the siblings and their spouses and one of the nieces and nephews with the bride and groom. We laughed at that one because we told them this was their future and neither of them looked super impressed but both of them are so good with the kids and I know they'll make great parents one day.

After that we headed to the ceremony which was so beautiful. The grass was dry, the sun was beginning to set but as the summer days stretch out the sunset lasted so long. We watched as my mom did an amazing job of performing the ceremony and got through with only a tremble in her voice. I cried, of course, but only a few times and none of it was all out sobbing. Just the tears of joy that my little brother was committing his life to one of the greatest joys one can have. They released two white pigeons (symbolic of doves that find one mate for their entire lives) and then a whole group of pigeons that all flew in pattern over the ceremony site.

Then we headed back to the barn for the rather lively reception. It was a party to say the least but I enjoyed the fact that my children were extremely well behaved, they headed home to my good friend Christa around 10:30 and I was free to enjoy the rest of the evening with my husband. I danced, I chatted, I enjoyed people watching, I just appreciated the fact that this would be last time in a very long time that I would be celebrating a wedding with my family. We have some to look forward to with cousins, of course, but most likely the next ones that we will all anticipate with great joy will be one of the grandkids.

Although that was a lot to write it only encapsulates a mere moment in the many memories that will forever remain in our hearts. Stories will be shared, laughter enjoyed when we look back on this day. And as Sam has so emphatically stated to many people, "Joelie is FINALLY married"!

Here is a link to the site for a few teasers of Joel and Meghan's professional shots.
http://jonmarkblog.squarespace.com/blog/2010/6/14/meghan-joel-teaser.html

Preparation

2010-06-13T11:00:00.000-07:00

In an effort to make this last wedding really special mom and I decided to take an adventure with Lanae to the spa. We got all ready (I took Lanae's frog robe with us) and headed out on Wednesday evening. The women who were assigned the task of making us "beautiful" led us into a quiet, private room where my mom and I were treated to a foot soak and message while Lanae had her nails and toes filed and polished. She sat completely still the whole time and even allowed her nails to dry for a good 10-15 minutes. My mom and I were able to get our toes completely done without too much effort on our part of keeping Lanae occupied. It was definitely a nice treat.
Fast-forward to Thursday evening...I spent the evening at Joel and Meghan's wedding venue tying beautiful sashes on chairs and setting up the reception barn. The evening was complete with laughter, fun, a bloody bird, which was followed by a moment of tension or two (which I'll let Joel and Meghan share when the wedding is over and they can laugh about it) and family.

Friday afternoon was filled with food prep as I headed over to my parents place in the afternoon and helped mom, dad, Trish and Amber put together all the decorations and food for a rehearsal dinner of 40+ guests. It was a pleasure to serve Meghan and Joel in this way and I can honestly say I would do that again in a heartbeat. The kids all enjoyed the festivities and were very well behaved (all five of them). They got a bit of attention but for the most part entertained themselves.

At 7:00pm we welcomed all the guests into mom and dad's home and let the party start. It was great evening that didn't get too out of hand (as most Neufeld parties do). The police showed up once, just to check out what was happening because someone told them a big party was going on, but they left shortly after because there really was nothing to see. All in all a successful night and a great way to begin the celebration.

Inspired

2010-06-12T19:30:00.000-07:00

So it started so many years ago! October of 1982 to be exact...a man and a woman made a commitment to spend a lifetime together and share the joys and sorrows of married life. I'm sure it hasn't been easy, in fact, anyone that's been married KNOWS that marriage takes work, love, and true sacrifice. However, the rewards that you receive far outweigh any heartache you experience along the way.

I hope in the years that my parents have been together they know that they have truly inspired four individuals to make that commitment a reality and honor the example they've set along the way.

11 years ago, I made that commitment and have never looked back. James and I continue to grow in the depth of love we have for each other. As we move through the many stages of love and experience our own joys and sorrows, I think I can speak for both of us when I say we have only learned to love each other deeper.

3 years ago, my brother Ben made a choice to follow in my parents footsteps and chose a wonderful woman, Trish, to share his life with. Their commitment and love for each other has been a blessing to our family and knowing the joys and sorrows they have already experienced I can honestly say that I admire their deep connection.

A year later, Tim added another woman, Amber, to our family and again blessed our family with an example of sacrifice and commitment. Their fun-loving, playful enjoyment of married life is refreshing and a great reminder that keeping love fresh is so important.

Now, today we join together one last time to witness and support two more individuals who are choosing this journey. Joel and Meghan have already shown their commitment to each other and the desire to make this life-long road a priority in their life. I know we will celebrate many years of blessing and love.

I love you

2010-06-12T11:20:00.000-07:00

The most precious words you hear, especially the first time your child says them. Of course Annie wasn't actually saying them directly to me, she was reading "Snuggle Puppy" but nevertheless she knows the words and will one day repeat them when I say them to her!

Here comes trouble!

2010-06-07T15:21:00.000-07:00

I don't really have lots to say today but this picture definitely makes me grin. I know having girls will bring its challenges and I'm pretty sure this one will be high on the list. As many of my friends can attest to I LOVE to talk. A good phone conversation or a face to face over tea refreshes my soul. Clearly this little girl is after my heart:) I often catch Annie playing with the phone in my bedroom so on occasion I'll just unplug the line and let her push the buttons and pretend to talk. The crazy thing is that it usually entertains her for at least 30-45 minutes. Oh the joys!

Someday Soon

2010-06-03T12:45:00.001-07:00

I had to fight off the tears this afternoon as I listened to my sweet daughter belting out the tune by Francesca Battistelli. She sang..."Someday falling in love with, Holding your hand, Making our plans all come true. Someday under a sky so blue, I'll give you my heart, Our story will start, someday soon".

So many emotions flooded my heart at once, joy, anticipation, fear, uncertainty, happiness, sadness.

In a little over a week we will celebrate the someday soon my baby brother has so eagerly anticipated for many years. Of course he didn't know Meghan would be the woman in his life the whole time he waited but thankfully she has graced his life with a fresh start and something so wonderful to look forward to. She will be everything he needs in a wife and best friend and I know that they will see many happy years together. The emotions flooded my mind for him in the things I gain in another sister, a new road for the journey our family is embarking on and the new experiences we can now share as siblings.

In the same breathe I could see the day I will give away my precious child to her "someday". She is a princess, a little girl who loves all things beautiful and starts the morning with a quest for the best dress to wear for the day. She helped me set up for a wedding with Meghan not that long ago and her constant buzz about the "married dress" and the "married chairs" (we were putting chair covers and sashes on banquet chairs for a reception) and the "married day of Uncle Joely and Auntie Meghan" was a delight to hear. But in the moment when I heard her sing a song that will one day hopefully be for the man God has chosen for her I was brought up short. I know I have so many years to prepare for this and I thank God that he gives us time to prepare our hearts and minds for those days. But it also reminded me of the need to begin praying for the people my children choose. To lift those, who are as of yet unknown to me, up to our Saviour, give him the burden of protecting my children's hearts and bringing people into their lives that will encourage, uplift, inspire, cherish and honor these precious jewels! It's a lesson I will likely need to be reminded of again and again but hopefully God will honor the prayer of this day that my little girl will find someone worthy of her "someday".

A special son

2010-06-01T22:25:00.000-07:00

Today I was reminded of how precious the four gifts I've been given truly are. I was reminded of so much more than just the joys they bring everyday but the eternal blessing they are to me and the amazing responsibility I have to cherish them. There are so many ways I could go with this post...but I'm going to try and remain on track.

Sam turned 9! Where did the years go...I have one more year to enjoy single digits and then we hit the big 1-0. Am I really old enough to have a child this age. Sometimes my body says, "yup, you're definitely old enough":) I know, I'm still a baby to some of you but when you've given birth four times there are parts that don't work as well, don't look the same, and just generally speaking the body starts to change. My mind says I'm still so young...I just graduated, I just got married, I just started this family! It could go on but the truth is I have a 9 year old!

When I see the beautiful boy that God has given me I'm astounded at the intricacy of our Creator's mind. I see a little boy, who is becoming a young man...I see a smile, a frown, a tear, a smirk and I know that there are so many faucets of this person. Some I know all too well and others that seem to escape my notice. I hear him growling in frustration at his homework, I see him gently lift his baby sister into his lap after dinner and snuggle her, I discuss with him the benefit of owning a "slap-chop" and how if I call in the next twenty minutes I'll also get a second one and a free grater and in all those moments I experience a myriad of emotions at how the baby I held such a short time ago has become such a beautiful person. He's far from perfect, he gets angry, he yells, he stomps, he slams doors but when I reflect in quieter moments I know that isn't what defines him. He's human, just like me! Instead I see that he is a sensitive, loving, kind little boy who belongs to me! I am the one who has been blessed with his presence. He's a gift to ME...a special treasure that should be valued and proudly displayed.

I hope that in the next 9 years I can hold on and let go, that I can guide him and befriend him, that I can love him and like him. Every year will bring a new challenge, a new realization of who he is but I know I can trust one thing...that the Creator of Heaven and Earth already has a purpose and knowledge of where he is leading this treasure of a child and what role I will play in that!

Happy Birthday Sam. You are a gift and my prayer is that you NEVER forget that.

Impromptu Excursion

2010-05-21T16:19:00.000-07:00

My brother Tim borrowed this great little sailboat from his in-laws and the two of us took off with the five kids to Cultus for a little bit of "sailing". Tim was a bit disappointed because this was only his second try with the little boat and the first time they got no wind at all. This time there wasn't much of a breeze but plenty of dribbles. Thankfully it picked up a little bit...enough to make a couple of short trips out past the dock and back again. The boys had an absolute blast in the boat and will definitely be eager to give it another try in the near future. Lanae tried once and was a bit scared but enjoyed it enough to talk about it for the next few days. Meeka and Annie spent the two or three hours chewing sand and getting soaking wet in the very chilly water. The sun peeked out enough to warm us up a bit and then we headed home full of fresh air. A great memory for the kids and a very enjoyable time spent for me and my brother chatting and playing with our kids.

Mother's Day

2010-05-10T22:08:00.000-07:00

I had a wonderful day yesterday celebrating being a mom that started on Friday afternoon and continued well into Monday! So really I would rather refer to it this year as Mother's weekend!

Friday afternoon I was invited by Jake's teacher to a Mother's day tea. She asked if I would be willing to help her out a little before the rest of the moms arrived and I was more than glad to accomodate her request. I got out my fine china with the full intention of spoiling the moms of Jake's friends. We had a great time drinking tea and eating strawberry shortcake and watching our enthusiastic five and six year olds singing the "Cricket Can-can" and a few other well rehearsed songs. Every child was so happy to show their mom (or Grandma) just how special they were. Jake gave me a little card with a tea bag inside and a great painting he'd done. It was a very special time for me to share with just him.

Saturday continued with an evening out with a few of my other mommy friends. It was such a joy to have us all together again for a time of fun and laughter. It was hard to believe that we hadn't done a girls night out since September as we picked up as if we'd never left off. Basking in the sun at Stanley park, checking out funny cards at Chapters and partaking of a fun feast of chocolate, chocolate and more chocolate (oh, and a little bit of wine).

Our plans for Sunday had originally involved church, home for lunch and naps and then another family trip to Stanley park with James' family but plans changed a little...I headed to church early to take care of a few details I'd missed during the week and when church was over was told to get changed and hope in the van because we were ready to go. James had packed a picnic lunch, a change of clothes for all the girls and was ready to head straight in. We ended up finding a wonderful place to picnic just the six of us and then met up with James' family at Second beach to let the kids play. We finished by walking back to Drew's place (James' brother) and then heading home in time to listen to the Canucks win the game on the radio (not really a big deal for me but the men in my life appreciated it)!

Today I figured we'd had such a good weekend and I really didn't want it to end so I gave the kids a "mental health day". My mom did this for me when I was little and I believe it made all the difference for me in my schooling years as I really never had the desire to skip school because I knew if I really needed a break all I had to do was ask and it would be figured out. So as a treat I declared it play-day for me and the kids and I abandoned all my regular monday chores for a day of fun. No laundry, house-cleaning, etc. The kids still had a few chores they had to take care of before heading out but nothing major. We headed to Mill Lake park for 2 1/2 hours in the morning to discover bull frogs, tree climbing, ducklings, goslings, a new playground and a lot of beautiful sunshine. Then we went to the library for some new reading material, then to the grocery store for a few necessities and a cookie from the bakery, then home to have lunch, play games and quiet time. We finished off our day with dinner and cheering Sam on at baseball.

I really couldn't have been blessed with a more enjoyable, relaxing, encouraging weekend than what I experienced. In the moments when I questions my sanity and really debate with myself why I wanted this life of chaos I can look back at the last four days and recognize that the treasures I have in this life are unbelievably abundant and God has richly blessed me in every area of my life!

31 Years

2010-05-03T13:16:00.000-07:00

Birthdays in my life seem to pass with no great trauma! I get to celebrate with the people I love the most and often it involves a gift of some sort. Sometimes a gift that really rocks and other times just a little something to help me feel special! The day in and of itself doesn't seem to create any great feelings in me one way or the other. I remember anticipating my birthday as a child and really enjoying the fabulous birthday parties my mom threw. As an adult I enjoy that I have a day that's all about me (let's be realistic, I think every woman loves that) and that it creates a reason for me to hang out with the kids, my husband, my parents and in-laws and all my brothers and sisters. It seems as we get older there are fewer opportunities to share with our extended family and I miss that. This year I didn't get a chance to hang out with James' family (but we're getting together for mother's day with them so we'll make up for it) but my family ALL managed to make it to our place for dinner and cake. It gave me lots of warm fuzzies, that probably sounds weird but it's true, to see my kids being loved by their aunts, uncles, grandma and grandpa! The kids absolutely adore all their extended family and having those relationships is a gift all on its own.

So when I look at the last 31 years and see how far we've come, the things we've accomplished in that period of time I can only say..."bring on the next 31 baby"! Hopefully there will be many more memories to create, laughter to share, kids to love, and just general fun times!

Laughter, fun and silliness

2010-04-28T09:20:00.000-07:00

I know I haven't been posting a lot of pictures lately and I'll be sure to get to some of those soon. But I wanted to take just a few minutes to share some fun! As some of you know James promised me dance lessons as my Christmas gift. He put the money aside and said he would book them when it got closer to my brother's wedding so we could at least remember what we'd learned instead of doing it right after Christmas.

Of course we didn't take the chance to start lessons when life was slow, we decided to wait until we had every night packed with activity before we decided to give it a try. I'm pretty sure James and I are both the kind of people who like to move, move, move all the time. It's no wonder that our children have issues sitting still and relaxing:) Anyway, as time passed we realized we better make this happen or we would miss the chance to use our new found dancing skills at Joel and Meghan's wedding!

So fast forward to April 27th @ 6:30pm! We headed out the door with 45 minutes to get to Langley, get dinner and get gas. Yup, another night of rushing out the door. After grabbing Wendy's and some gas we jumped on the freeway for Langley. Uneventful for the most part until we come to finding the studio. Okay I exaggerate a bit but truth be told James drives the van like a race car and it makes me nervous and when he zoomed past the turn it made me feel justified in getting on his case for not paying attention. I think we both thought the same thing..."what a way to start a new adventure and give our marriage a little life"! Thankfully we were both able to take a breath, laugh it off and get ourselves back in the mood of the evening.

So the studio itself seems a little boring from the outside (it's located in an industrial park) but once you step inside it's a very nicely laid out, well-kept little place. There were a lot of people there for the intro class we were taking and another good chunk of people there to take a level 2 Waltz class. James and signed in, paid and then proceeded to look around at a number of people pouring in all carrying their special shoe bags. We wondered if we missed something and then realized that not everyone had these, only the "serious" dancers. Yes, we laughed at these well-intentioned folks who probably joined the classes just like us but found a new passion and pursued it whole-heartedly!

Our class was scheduled from 7:30-8:30 and we were supposed to learn Tango, Waltz and Swing. Yes, the Tango is the sexy dance where the man carries a rose in his mouth. No, James did not have a rose in his mouth and he did not run his hand up my leg or dip me! This is intro people we only learned the most basic steps. It was a great lesson in allowing my husband to lead. I held my tongue and held my body back from taking charge. It wasn't as difficult as I thought it would be and James has great rythme so I think we actually did pretty good. I know for a fact James had fun and I'm pretty sure he'll be keen on taking a few more lessons in the future. We laughed at our silly moments (we only stepped on each other's toes once) and when we got home James even whipped me in his arms once in the kitchen to practise the tango!

We are both looking forward to our next class and hopefully this will be the start of something new and exciting that we can both enjoy in years to come!

To have or not to have...

2010-04-14T12:49:00.000-07:00

I think one of the greatest struggles I have as a grown-up is living without! I am always thankful that I live in a country where there is so much abundance. If truth be told it's over abundance which tends to lead to over-indulgence but in all fairness it's hard to keep from wanting more and more and more when that's the world we live in and it's available.

As a child I never wanted for anything. Sure I THOUGHT there were things I REALLY, REALLY needed and I'm sure I laid the guilt trip on nice and heavy at times but my every need was met and without going overboard I got many of the thing I wanted too. My parents didn't go crazy with name brand clothing, they didn't take us on really extravagant holidays every year, we didn't get the latest and greatest toy the moment it hit the shelf but we were happy. The memories I have of my childhood are fresh and pure. The kind of memories I hope my own children have...playing in the yard, learning to ride a bike, camping with my family, etc.

Now that I am entering the years that I know my children will remember I battle the same things I'm sure my own parents did when I was my kids age. I will place a disclaimer here that I DO NOT in ANY WAY regret the choices in my life...I'm happy, I love who I am, where I've come from and where I'm at right now BUT I do sometimes lay in bed at night wondering how my life would be different had I made different choices. What if James and I had waited just a few more years to get married? What if I had finished my degree completely before I had Sam? What if we had just stayed in the townhouse a few more years? What if we only have two children instead of four? What if I didn't make being at home with my children a priority and decided to work fulltime? So many what ifs you might say. Then after I reconcile the choices I've made with the firm belief that my God is in control I move on to living in the here and now. Unfortunately there are many questions that plague my mind in my reality as well. What if Sam feels forever scarred because he's missing out when he doesn't get the latest and great video game system, or to participate in ice hockey (as he so desperately wants to)? What if I missed a really big opportunity by not putting Jake in dance, since he has such great moves? What if Lanae could have been a really talented musician but we just couldn't do the music lessons, the sports, the educational extras? What if by the time Annie gets old enough to do these things we can manage it and the older three are bitter because they didn't get the same chances? All this in the name of not enough money!!!! You see where it just never ends. And yet I know I can't change where we are. James has a great job that he is super happy at. I have a great opportunity at the job I'm at and hopefully it will help me as I continue towards a teaching position. My kids go to school where they can learn, they have more than two changes of clothes, they eat more than three square meals a day, we each only share a room with one person, they sleep in warmth and safety, and the list goes on for days. If I tried really hard I could make the list of haves three, four, five times as long as the have nots. Why can I not daily live in that place?

To answer that question I have to go back to the basic roots of my upbringing...another area of my life that my parents blessed me with. To the basic fact that God created a desire in each of us for MORE! He intended that desire to be filled with his Holy Spirit, with his peace, with his understanding, love, patience, and goodness, but in the world that we've created for ourselves we seek to fill that desire with STUFF. I recognize this is a great insecurity in my life. I'm not sure where it came from and why it holds me but it does. In my times of quiet I lay it at the cross but pretty much every time I get up from that place I take it back. Do I fear he won't carry it for me? Do I fear he's incapable, do I brashly think I'm MORE capable? Again I can't answer that question but I have to trust that in the grander scheme of things God is GREATER than all these things and whether I chose to embrace that or not he remains just that GREATER...

Greater than a new house
Greater than a new car
Greater than ice hockey
Greater than the latest toy for my kids
Greater than the latest technology released by Apple
Greater than the most fabulous vacation on earth
And definitely GREATER than my desire to have all of the above!!!

Redemption, Grace and my sinful nature...

2010-04-06T13:54:00.000-07:00

So after a wonderful weekend that was spent reminding our entire family of Christ's love for us I spent the morning today being reminded that there was in fact a reason that we NEED Jesus to have accomplished redemption for us. Here's why...

I'm not sure if it's mainly because Sam is the oldest, and everything is new with him or if it's because of his personality but I find so many more challenges in parenting him than my other children. It's not a matter of favortism or dislike by any stretch of the imagination I just often find myself at my end with him and more often than not I lose it!

This morning was a typical start to our week. He's an incredibly smart boy who does very well in school. His teachers always speak very highly of him, his attitude and behaviour, his actions to other children and his schoolwork. But the first day back to school after a weekend more often than not ends up in a battle. He says he hates school and it's too hard. If I remember the cycle in the morning than I take preventative steps and we manage to get out the door without a fight but IF I'm tired or short it makes for a very regretful morning. Today was a morning that I forgot and I hadn't had a very good sleep so I was rushed and extremely tired. As I reminded him again and again and again to do various tasks to get ready for the day I found myself closer and closer to the edge. Of course not acting the adult I should have I stepped over and the result was less than desireable.

The thing that struck me the most when Sam and I discussed it in the van was how transparently I could see his heart through his eyes. What I saw was rebellion, anger, arrogance and a general lack of care or concern for the events that had unfolded.

Now as many moms know this can happen at various times throughout our children's lives and it's not that I didn't expect it it's just I thought I had a little more time to prepare for this stage of life. I explained to Sam what I saw in his eyes and asked him if that's who he wanted to be. A sheen of tears appeared and he mumbled "no" but he quickly composed himself and shut out the clear conviction of the Holy Spirit in his heart. It made me sad to see my oldest son willingly close the door and at the same time made me realize that aside from being on my knees more often for this child I cherish that I HAVE to find a different way to parent him. He has never had the kind of sensitive spirit that other children possess, instead he has a drive and determination that keep him going. It's not to say that he doesn't feel or that he can't find compassion in his heart but these are not his strong areas. He is rule-lover, he sees black and white, he sees the beginning and the end. In so many ways he mirrors me.

After I dropped him off I began to take note of the things he values. He loves sports, he enjoys his friendships, he ALWAYS wants to spend quality time with James and I, he thrives through competition and activity. At first I thought perhaps what we needed to do was take away some of those activities that he loves in order to make him think about his attitude, perhaps he needs to have a complete absence of these things. I tried to think of ways that we could replace these activities with more faith-based programs or church type activities to help him get to the heart of some of this. But I soon realized that God meets us where we are...putting him into another program will not change his heart only God can do that and that taking things that he loves away will probably lead to more rebellion and anger. I realized that he needed to see more from me as his mom and feeling Christ's example in my life. I began to see that I needed to be more intentional in bringing Christ into our everyday life and perhaps even more importantly doing some sort of devotions with him that will help him begin to see the conviction of the Holy Spirit and willingly open his heart to that. He sees it in James through Pioneer clubs ministry and they have a chance to share bible teaching in this venue but Sam doesn't get a lot of that personal reflection that develops character here at home.

I am hoping that we can overcome some of these struggles through prayer on mine and James' part but I'm also hoping that we can begin to work through some of these heart issues with Sam on a more practical level as well! After spending a bit of time in prayer and in scripture this morning I feel much more positive than I did this morning and I hope and continue to pray that God will guide James and I through this incredibly difficult, but rewarding job of parenting.

Catch-up

2010-03-19T11:29:00.000-07:00

It's been awhile since I've posted. Sorry I didn't keep you up to date on the book I was reading. I did finish it and was thoroughly inspired by it. Many of the concepts and ideas cross my mind as I parent my children daily. I donated it to the church library so those who go to Heritage can check it out there and others who want to read it can find it at a local christian bookstore or online I'm sure (definitely worth the read)!

I thought I'd just post a few pictures of life in the Davenport home as of late. We are completely enjoying our early spring and looking forward to the start of baseball season. It will be a fun spring with James, Sam, Jake and I all participating on ball teams this year. Busy but worth it I'm sure. The boys are excited to get started with their season as well as cheering James and I on!

Anyway, here are a few pictures of what's been happening here:

The one above and the one below are our little adventure back to Vancouver during the Paralympics. We didn't get to see much during the actual Olympics when we went downtown so this was a much better adventure for our family!

The pictures below are a small family celebration for Christina's 19th birthday (James' cousin from Ontario who is currently living with his parents)

Now that the weather has been so beautiful the kids enjoy spending a lot of time out front. Although we have a pretty busy street Sam, Jake and Lanae know their boundaries and usually pretty good about staying away from the road. As a visual reminder we usually park a car parallel on the driveway to keep them from just darting out or heaven forbid another car from careening in.

This is my darling baby who likes to wear the top of the popcorn popper as a hat. I quite often find Annie with this get-up and needless to say it always gives me a chuckle.

Sam's teacher is very creative in her art and because Sam enjoys art he often comes home with very well done pieces. This is just a sample of one of the pieces they did for the Olypmics.

Finally this is a picture of Lanae pretending to be a Kangaroo! She came up with this idea all by herself and I have to admit I was pretty surprised at the knowledge she had about this animal considering we've never talked about it.

Myth #3

2010-02-13T08:00:00.000-08:00

So the third myth that Fields states in her book is that "Parenting is your highest calling"!!! Who doesn't enter parenthood thinking this is true and yet as a young mom I've often felt the shrivelling in my spirit as I think of what happens if I fail at this task. In reading this book I understand how as individuals, regardless of our earthly role, we are called to something much greater than this..."If I pursue God first as my highest calling and am satisfied in his love, then I am freed not to love my children less but to love them rightly." (p. 73) WOW...a huge eye opener in understanding that and knowing how I have failed at that call more often than I've failed in the call of being a mother.

On page 66 she states, "our greatest and most constant temptation as parents is to unseat the Sovereign from his throne and replace him with our family". How many times have I put my family before my faith and my personal relationship with my own Creator. Matthew 10:37 (New International Version) says this:

37"Anyone who loves his father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves his son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me;

I see now how my motherly eyes have been blinded to believe that by placing more emphasis on my role as a parent rather than as a child of God, I have actually done my children a disservice. I have limited my communion with the Holy Spirit which in turn limits my ability to be the kind of parent God is capable of making me.

What I feel challenged by in this chapter is this...I must be willing to serve my husband and my children because they are who God has blessed me with but when I feel the Spirit leading in a direction somewhat contradictory to this area of service I must follow to experience the greater purpose God has for my life. By not following I miss out on the great blessing he has for me and jeopardize the greater purpose he may intend for my family!

Myth #2

2010-02-11T08:00:00.000-08:00

How many times have you heard the phrase that being a mother is natural and your instinct will kick in??? I love this chapter of Fields book, "Parenting is your highest calling..."

She has so many poignant ideas that strike a chord deep in my mothering soul. In this chapter she talks about how parenting is actual quite the opposite especially if we consider our human nature. As Christians we know that we have a sinful nature that is selfish and not at all capable of constantly loving unconditionally. She starts the chapter with a moment I've had numerous times in my mothering years. A day starts with the intention of being loving, kind, generous and loving unconditionally but one thing leads to another...I fight with my son, I get irritated with my daughter, food gets spilled, toys are strewn everywhere and bedtime is a battle. She sums it up exactly how I feel..."By the time we were done my heart was cold. I had lost my appetite for sweet affirmations of love and I no longer felt like praying...My life with this son did not begin this way."(p38) How many times in a day have I cried these same words.

She proceeds to explain that as we check scripture against this idea that loving is natural and instinctive we will find exactly the opposite. I love how she pulls scripture after scripture out of the old testament of God's disappointment in his chosen people for their lack of obedience and faith. His desire to give them so much more but their lack of interest and often turning their backs on the one who loves them most. Yet he continually disciplines them and then gives them another chance. He communes with them despite his holy anger at their disobedience and wayward ways. The challenge she presents is how are we measuring this "natural" love we have for our children.

"I want to measure love not by what I receive but by the orientation of my own heart and my actions towards others." (p. 52) If I chose to recognize that I will not naturally love my children unconditionally because I simply can't do that on my own but to find freedom in the fact that in God's grace he will give me what I need to love my children and long for communion with them despite the things they do.

Bringing it all together!

2010-02-09T10:43:00.000-08:00

Thankfully my excitement for God's word has become even greater and the freedom I am feeling is amazing. I love how in choosing a relationship over duties I feel a connection deeper than I've felt in a long time.

The thing that intrigues me the most is how in these times of communion with God life can still get pretty ugly around us and yet the peace that passes understanding can be so all encompassing that we really can take great steps forward. I have often wondered how people whom I consider very wise in the ways of the Lord can have such tragedy invade their lives on a regular basis? How does one really cope with that and keep it together, all the while rejoicing and praising God for his goodness? This week has brought a little glimpse of that into my life. Although it isn't really tragedy but rather deep, personal struggles that a family member faces I feel God's presence and peace in a way I've never felt before. I hear the words of scripture and see the faith of people through the centuries and know beyond a shadow of a doubt that God is alive and bursting when one of his children chooses life over and over!

I have kept reading daily with the rest of my congregation and everyday brings a new nugget of information from texts I have read numerous times in my life.

Matthew 5:28 "because she thought, 'If I just touch his clothes, I will be healed'." How amazing to me that the mere touch of Jesus' robe would bring healing that she had sought for a lifetime. What would be different in my life if I had faith that great.

Mark 26:13 "'I tell you the truch, wherever this gospel is preached throughout the world, what she has done will also be told, in memory of her.'" How many times have I heard the story of the woman who sacrificed a year's wages to honor Jesus. Her story has been told for centuries and still is in memory of her!

Matthew 27:52 "The tombs broke open and the bodes of many holy people who had died were raised to life." I have NEVER actually read this scripture before or at least not SEEN it with eyes open. How awesome must that have been?

Mark 6:51&52 "Then he climbed into the boat with them, and the wind died down. They were completely amazed, for they had not understood about the loaves; their hearts were hardened." WHY??? How could these men who had given up everything for Jesus and seen him perform miracle after miracle have hardened hearts and still not understand who he was? Yet day after day I am surrounded by God's miracles: my children, his creation, the love I still have for my husband after almost 11 years of marriage, a fully intact extended family who loves him wholeheartedly, and yet I often doubt how he will provide for some of our financial needs. Really how much do I need to see before I believe he is all-powerful?

What I love the most is that in all this I do feel his love, his disappointment in my lack of faith but forgiveness for the sinful nature that controls me. I hear his reassurance in the story of his miraculous birth and death on the cross for me and saving grace so that one day I may share with him a communion beyond this life!

Truth Seekers!

2010-01-30T18:59:00.000-08:00

One of the many things my mother passed on to me was a love of learning! I have not always understood her intense desire to pursue a greater degree of formal education but to be perfectly honest the desire to gain a deeper amount of knowledge is something I CAN completely understand. I have completed a university degree and although I do not have a deep yearning to go back to school for a masters or doctorate or anything of that nature, I do thoroughly enjoy the classroom setting and the interaction that leads to an "a-ha" moment. Over the last few months I've considered the fact that one day soon I will have to return to school in order to finish my formal education to become a teacher but in the meantime I need to find ways to occupy my more "intellectual" side that doesn't cost an arm and a leg.

My thoughts were to combine that desire to learn, become better at the job I am doing now and a better parent into one effort. So on a quiet afternoon last week I headed to House of James, our local Christian bookstore, and began searching through their non-fiction section on parenting. I was looking for a particular book my good friend, Heather, suggested but came across a book entitled, "'Parenting is your Highest Calling' and 8 other Myths That Trap Us in Worry and Guilt" by Leslie Leyland Fields. The title immediately caught my attention and my first reaction really was more along the lines of what the heck is a book like this doing in House of James...of course parenting is one of the highest callings! But the rest of the title intrigued me and got me wondering what incites this author might have regarding parenting.

The first chapter of the book is "Parenting doesn't have to be this hard"! She talks about how we so often feel like failures, particularly moms, because parenting seems so difficult and the assumption that if it feels difficult we must be doing it wrong. The first challenge that is stewing in my brain right now is this, "pretending that parenting is easy diminishes the value of family. As truth seekers and truth speakers, we need to be honest about the cost of parenting...Yet not many of us have examined our own parenting assumptions and expectations, holding them up to the unsparing light of the Scriptures." I thought about that for a day or two, pondering what exactly we have done as Christian parents and I know my personal response affirms her point. I have discussed, vented, prayed, and every other possible action aside from examining them next to scripture. I have held to the cultural notion that parenting should be easy IF I am doing it right.

The second challenge is even more revolutionary in my mind. I've always just assumed that God is a happy, loving, sacrificial parent figure and to that degree of joy, love and happiness is what I must aspire. However, Fields challenges that notion through scriptural reference..."we seldom see God as a happy, blithe parent. We see instead God hungering for more...God reveals himself as a hurting and tender Father who longs for a deeper relationship with his children...We see God allowing his heart to be broken again and again by our failures." At first I thought really how is that possible for a perfect God to encompass those ideas. Then I began reading the passages she was using as evidence...Exodus 4:22, Malachi 1:6, Isaiah 66:13, Isaiah 65:2. I could identify with the words of truth spoken there. How many times have I already wondered, and will wonder in years to come, where is the honor I would love to see my children afford me and felt like I have held out loving arms to "obstinate" children. A perfect God has felt those things with the people He has created and still feels that in the moments I do not follow His will for my life.

I am eager to continue reading this book and find the truths God will teach me through this but I also want to be a truth seeker and speaker and recognize that this job I have for now is NOT easy. In reality it's very difficult and comes with many sorrows, tears, anger and frustration but isn't the truth in this particular chapter that light is always so much more comforting and appreciated when it comes at the end of dark tunnel. My comfort lies in the fact that THE LIGHT has and continues to experience my journey but illuminates the path before me so perhaps I might learn from His example.

Belonging

2010-01-28T18:43:00.000-08:00

"How do I raise wonderful children who have avoided many of the world's temptations?" I ask myself this questions daily, knowing full well that my children never have been and never will be perfect. However, I would like to have children who are grounded, a delight to be around, role-models for their generation and those to come, truthful, godly, etc., the list could go on forever really! Most importantly I want my children to know that in a world of hurt, confusion, drugs, alcohol, sex, anger, and frustration they have a place to belong. How often do we hear kids talking about wanting to find acceptance and a place to belong and all too often finding it in places that lead to darkness, despair and depression.

Over the last few weeks I've felt a little of that despair myself. How can James and I possibly raise all four of our children to be wonderful, amazing people both in our eyes and God's? This morning as I sat in on a great lesson with a very wise woman I was given a fresh perspective and lifted from some of that discouragement.

We began evaluating from a less "spiritual" perspective what the basic needs of a person are. In my undergraduate years we studied a little of these types of things. The basic needs of food, shelter, and clothing have to be met first. Then safety and security, third was belonging, and so on and so forth. One of the last human needs is love (not THE last but close to it). As a parent I've always tried to tell and show my children how much I love them not always grasping that the "need" for love is actually quite small in comparison to some of the more basic needs that I may have been neglecting. But as I gave this concept more thought I clearly remembered my own childhood. I never once questioned that my parents loved me despite the fact that I didn't hear it from them daily but more importantly I ALWAYS knew that at the end of the day I BELONGED to them, in their home, in the shelter of their protection. No matter what I did or did not do I would not be forced outside of that protection.

As our "teacher" shared with us in more detail the types of people she deals with in her own profession she challenged us that the best thing we could do for our children was to help them understand that they are OURS! As a believer we cling to the truth that we belong to God and he lives in us. We are a family in Christ and nothing we say or do can get us in or out of that family. It's a gift, freely given and a place to remain without condemnation! In Romans we find evidence of this desire as Paul writes in Romans 1:5-6 "Through him and for his name's sake, we received grace and apostleship to call people from among all the Gentiles to the obedience that comes from faith. And you also are among those who are called to BELONG to Jesus Christ." The chosen people were the Jews but how much more meaningful would it have been to the Gentiles knowing that this gift of belonging was free to them as well!

I decided to put these ideas to the test and as I scooped my darling three year old daughter up I whispered in her ear that she was MY beautiful, child and she would always be mine! I was rewarded with the biggest grin and sweetest giggle as I buckled her into her seat. Then I turned and buckled my very affectionate five year old into his seat and whispered similar words into his ear. I was not disappointed by his response either. Both proved the point that they knew they were loved but more than anything they felt treasured and protected by my affirmation that they BELONGED to me.

In a world that offers little in the way of true belonging and real love I realized that in order to help my children become the people I know God wants them to be I must first provide for them a safe home where they can be themselves and know they are always, ALWAYS welcome and treasured. THE place where THEY belong and then train them up in the way they should go so they will not depart from it.

These precious gifts do, in fact, BELONG to me and always will!

Playing!

2010-01-25T15:33:00.000-08:00

I know I've said this more times than I can count but the blessings I have received and my children have received from relationships in our extended family are far too numerous to count. Having both sets of parents and siblings so close by does not come without it's challenges but I have to say that I would not trade the great bonds being developed for any amount of distance on this earth. Maybe that sounds sappy to some and to others nearly impossible to fathom. I understand that every family comes with baggage and frustrations but for the most part James and I try to overlook these areas and focus on the positive aspects.

The other night Tim and Amber invited themselves for dinner and proceeded to arrive amidst the chaos that we call "home". Sam and Jake both had friends over for a playdate and both friends were kids that have always felt very comfortable in our home. The moment "Uncle" Tim arrived all four of the boys were ready and willing to grab a leg, arm, armpit, etc. anything that would engage Tim in a wrestling match. For those who don't know my brother, he is a 6'4" police officer who is more than ready for a take-down at a moment's notice. Much fun was had by all the boys and they all left the room with red, sweaty faces (Tim was no exception).

Now the thing I love most about Tim is that he is fun-loving and extremely easy-going about almost anything. But when it comes to playing with his nieces and nephews he is downright serious about tiring them out. All my brothers are actually pretty good that way but Tim definitely took the cake with his creativity on this particular activity. After dinner my four kids asked for another wrestling match and Tim obliged.

Following is a video of our very own "Canadian, Junior bobsledding team". It was a good laugh for me!

Careless Words!

2010-01-15T10:33:00.000-08:00

I have endeavored two things in the past two weeks...Number one is to do my daily exercise routine before lunch every weekday and to follow the bible readings that our pastor suggested every morning during my tea break! So far so good and I have to say a new excitement has been building for both my physical and spiritual health. This morning as I was contemplating so many things the scripture I read struck me with such force both for my own personal being and for the greater world around me.

Matthew 12:36 "But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgement for every careless word they have spoken."

My first thought was how many times have I carelessy spoken to my children, out of frustration, anger, in jest, etc. What account will I have to give for the way I have randomly made a comment to a friend or callously fired a remark at my husband. Never has a piece of scripture burned such conviction on my heart.

As I consider these words on a little bigger scale I think of the lonely young woman who has graced our extended family with her presence for an period of time. She has uprooted herself from her friends and family across the country in order to start fresh and get her life back together. In talking with her over the last few days I see a weary, young lady who has been hurt beyond compare with careless words spoken in anger. Words that may have held some truth but did nothing help her see just how far down a troubled road she had already travelled but pushed her like a bulldozer even farther down the ugly road. Words spoken by those who are charged with loving her and building her up. As I said we often do this to people we love but the reality is that there is no justification for such things and they will indeed come back to "haunt us".

On a grander scale I see the implications of careless words spoken in relation to the disaster of Haiti! I could not keep my jaw from dropping as I listened, this morning, to a "minister" of Christian faith proclaim that the earthquake of Haiti was a direct result of the pact Haitian leaders had made with the devil. A judgement proclaimed from God on their people for "selling their souls". As I listened to another talkshow interview Haitian Canadians waiting desperately to hear from family members or finding out that members of their families had been killed and buried in the rubble of their own home, I could not keep the tears from coming knowing that someone who claims to know MY God could pronounce such ficticious judgement on an entire people group.

I'm not really one to preach my faith from the rooftops. I prefer to live my life by example and love as Christ would love in order to draw people to him and allow his Holy Spirit to do the work. However, as I grow older and hopefully wiser I see that there are times when only a loud cry to him on behalf of lost, hurting souls can be heard and that as a believer I must defend my belief that God is not a God of carelessly spoken words but one who carefully chose his words with unconditional love and a deep desire to draw his children to him!

My challenge in the coming days is to think more clearly and deeply and speak less. A challenge that for any woman is difficult but one that MUST be taken seriously in a time when the spoken word is all too often tossed carelessy from the mouth.

I never cease to be amazed...

2010-01-08T21:20:00.001-08:00

by Jake that is! Most of you have already befriended on Facebook and therefore know what I mean by this. But to actually write down how cool it feels when you have a child that just "gets" something! Jake has always been a unique little boy. From the day he was born he has been my snuggler. People used to ask if he was really just that content to sit quietly on my lap without squirming away. He has been my most emotional child thus far and although it wears on my nerves it does create a special bond for us. He is the first to tell me I look like a princess even on the worst hair day possible and first to tell me he loves me. He goes from laughing to crying in a matter of minutes and rarely a day goes by without a bit of a tantrum. It does not make parenting him easy but in his moments of joy, laughter and compliments he is terribly easy to love.

In this past week he surprised me with an ability to read! You might be wondering why that's such a big deal but when you consider the fact that he's 5, only half way through kindergarten, I've never actually worked on "reading" with him and his teacher had no clue this was possible, it does in fact strike a cord. He brought me a small book of early reading books my good friend, Heather, lent to me and opened it and read the first sentence, "The fat cat sat in the red box." There was a picture but it is more of pencil sketch and it is not colored so he could not have just looked at the picture and read the sentence perfectly. When I asked him if he had been working on his words at school he said, "no, I just know how to read". WHAT!!! Who just does that? I know I'm a bit biased and probably too proud (which by the way I'm trying to temper so my other children don't get a complex) but the look of sheer enthusiasm that covered his face could not be ignored. We proceeded to read four more of said books with only a few words of help on my part. He sounded words out and even self corrected when it didn't make sense. I know this is but a tiny accomplishment in the world of education he has yet to face but a major stepping stone in conquering one of the most important aspects of living.

To say the least, I am in awe and joyful at the great achievement he has accomplished.

Special Gift

2010-01-08T21:18:00.001-08:00

I think my mom has been waiting for granddaughters all her life. Although it took her awhile to warm up to having grandchildren she has overcome that in leaps and bounds. Over the years she has found a number of wonderful things to give my four children. Things, not the least of which is her time and love. But being a bit sentimental the things I tend to cling to are the tangible evidence of her deep love for them.

My mom learned to crochet when she was but a little girl and an art she has not lost! It is definitely not a skill I have inherited but I am beginning to think I should learn. Each of my children have received a beautifully hand-crocheted afghan from my mother. Sam's is the old Canucks colors of maroon, navy, blue and white, while Jake's is the new Canucks colors, bright green, blue and white. Lanae was given a lacy, white and pink baby afghan with pink satin ribbon woven into it when she was born and Annie has a wonderfully delicate, lacy cream baby afghan. A few years ago Sam also requested a sweater. My mom obliged but gained reassurance from Sam that he would actually wear it. Although it was meant for him when he was 6 he still shoves it on and wears it on cold winter days under his winter jacket.

Well, in recent years mom has again picked up a little bit of a lost art from her early married years. As a little girl, I remember running under a quilting frame with various members of my family positioned on all sides of this quilt. They would spend days on it and carefully hand-stitch the quilt together. It seems a little House on the Prairie-ish for me but the results were always stunning. Having said that I was so excited when mom said she wanted to make matching quilts for my girls. Knowing my mom I knew it would only be the best material, the best quality, and the most superb craftsmanship possible. Needless to say I was not disappointed! Lanae's quilt is the first to be finished and I know Annie's will follow shortly. In the picture above Lanae is really sleeping! She was so thrilled to receive this wonderful gift and I am happy that she has this token of love from her grandma to remember her always.

To be honest it is clearly not just I whom the sentimental bug bit because both my sons have asked for a similar gift from Grandma. Thankfully my mom will be willing to accomodate that request but I'm hoping that maybe it will be something we can do together so I can learn this beautiful talent she has!

Christmas Traditions and Memories

2010-01-02T20:56:00.000-08:00

I know it's been a ridiculously long time since I blogged but life has been crazy so this was the first thing to be put on hold! However after a friendly reminder from my good friend Tillie, I realized that some people do indeed still check to see what my life looks like. Although I choose not to make New Year's resolutions I will endeavor to keep this little corner of the virtual world more up to date:)

So I'll start with the wonderful memories we created this past Christmas. When I was a little girl my mom had this cute calendar that started on December 1st and went until Christmas eve. It was made of felt and had tiny little pockets in it. It wasn't unique in and of itself but it was the way my mom chose to use it that created the most amazing memories for me and I have carried that tradition into my own house. So each year on November 30th I drag out my calendar and begin brainstorming activities that I can write on small pieces of paper and put into each little pocket. These activities may include such things as decorating the Christmas tree, making cookies, finger painting, homemade playdough, etc., etc. The point is that each day has something unique that is either related to Christmas or has some aspect of family time together. Now that we have a fake tree December first is always decorating the Christmas tree, much to my enjoyment and to the chagrin of James. I usually unpack the trees, the Christmas CDs and get them ready so that when James gets home and we've eaten dinner we can then spend some time focusing on this altogether. Thankfully my husband is a great sport and always chooses to participate. I hope and pray this will continue even as our children grow since part of the reason they love it so much is because we do it all together. The other reason we cherish this time is because many of our Christmas tree ornaments hold special meaning. For example I made ornaments for each of the children on their first Christmas from their footprints and every year since I have tried to come up with some unique ornament so that when they move into their own home they will have something that first year to put on their tree. James reminded this year that perhaps I should think about choosing an age to stop this tradition as the kids may find it kind of silly as they get older so we chose 10 as the appropriate year to finish with that for each of the kids! That means I have two more years for Sam and a few more for the other three. Some of the other special ornaments include ones that my mom purchased for James and I when we were engaged and first married as well as one particular ornament my mom purchased for me the year I miscarried during the Christmas season. Each year when I put that one on the tree I get a little catch in my throat as the kids remember that there actually was one more baby Davenport. It's bittersweet in its rememberance for me.

Other Christmas activities are our Church family skate, decorating a gingerbread house, celebrating James' birthday, the kids Christmas programs at school and church, doing a tour of lights in our town, going to Van Dusen park or on the Christmas train at Stanley park, and Christmas carolling. A few of these activities had to be abandoned this year because of snow or just exhaustion from too much happening but we managed to enjoy quite a few.

As far as Christmas productions are concerned this year was a particularly busy season for those. The kids' school is rather traditional in how they celebrate which I really appreciate. Sam's class explored how different cultures celebrate but front and center was the nativity scene and my wonderful eight year old played the part of Joseph. He was excellent with his lines and looked so sweet playing a little man. Jake's class has an amazing opportunity to learn sign language since one of his classmates is deaf. Their class sang the song, "Little toy trains" and did the sign language for it as well. Jake was fabulous and sang his heart out. Now the kids also had the privilege of participating in the church program. Since I was able to coordinate it this year with an amazing team of people working with me it was a great success. The live orchestra, the children's choir, and the great acting made it such a wonderful performance. Of course the cutest by far were the little ones who were the cows and sheep in the nativity scene. That included Lanae and she was more than thrilled to be included in something that put her front and center.

This year we spent Christmas Eve with my parents. Thankfully most of us had the day off so everyone except for Joel's fiance, Meghan, who had to work a little later and Ben and Trish, who headed over the Island to spend Christmas with her family this year, headed over the mom and dad's right after lunch. We all pitched in to help with dinner and then just spent the day opening gifts, visiting and playing! It was actually pretty relaxing even with my four kids and Tim and Amber's little guy, Meeka. Lanae and Annie both took a turn dancing with grandpa since my parents have recently taken up dance lessons. It was so sweet to see them both enjoying my dad and feeling cherished as every little girl should. The boys enjoyed the Wii game we purchased for them (actually we all have over the holidays) and all the kids were thrilled to get new shirts or dresses specially purchased from Jamaica from Uncle Joelly and Auntie Meghan. We attended Heritage's Christmas Eve service which was simple and enjoyable and then headed back to mom and dad's for appetizers and games.

Christmas morning the kids actually managed to sleep until 7:30 so we all jumped out of bed and began opening gifts. The kids were eager for us to open the gifts they purchased for us. The boys' school holds a Christmas craft fair each year and they both brought some money and purchased small gifts for each family member. My sons know me so well since they both came home with a pair of earrings for me. Yes, if you're wondering they were slightly tacky but I've managed to wear both pairs and the look of delight on their faces is worth whatever mockery I might have to endure for my plastic, glittery, snowflake earrings. James also spoiled me this year and signed us up for the same dance lessons my parents have been taking. Joel and Meghan are determined to have a proper dance at their wedding so it will be neat to actually know how to dance. However, James surprised me with the idea to go to a few of the "dance parties" the dance studio holds after lessons. Who knows, maybe this will be one of those hobbies we will enjoy well into our retirement years.

I don't have any pictures of this one but James has made it a bit of a tradition with which ever family we are spending Christmas day with to make a big brunch. He whips out his big skillet and makes a feast for the morning. This year he treated us to bacon, breakfast sausage, fresh fruit, orange juice, eggnog french toast with cinnamon butter and syrup, eggs, hashbrowns...it was amazing and a great way to settle into Christmas day.

We ended the Christmas festivities at Jim and Janet's with gift opening, wine, visiting, laughing, and a full roast beef meal. This year we were glad to have Drew and his girlfriend, Saika, join us for the day. It was a wonderful day and the kids enjoyed every minute of it as did James and I.

What I value most every Christmas is the closeness of both our families. Sometimes it's just the proximity that keeps us close and other years we truly feel the bond of relationship that brings us together and keeps us united. Although we do not spend a great deal of time discussing this we all know that in the world we live in today dysfunction reigns in many families and often brings with it horrible experiences especially around the holiday season. I can honestly say that I LOVE both of our families and cherish the time we have together. It is a refreshing break from the chaos of life and every year reminds me of what Christ have given us in His relationship with us.

I hope this year I will be able to take a little more time to share the experience God is giving me and how they are impacting my own growth and my family! I hope I haven't lost too many of you in negligence of my blog but for those of you still checking I hope this year brings many blessings for you as well.

The Newest member of the Neufeld clan

2009-08-28T14:28:00.000-07:00

Meeka Ward Neufeld made his appearance in the wee hours of the morning (1:33 to be exact) on August 26th after 26ish hours of labour! When I got a chance to pop in for a short visit an hour later my brother, Tim, looked positively exhausted and his wife, Amber, looked radiant! Both had the tired but clearly joyful looks of new parenthood plastered on their faces and both proudly watched as their newborn son was passed eagerly around the room! I know it sounds kind of poetic doesn't it!? But really what else could it be when the miracle of new life emerges into the waiting arms of two loving people and an extended family ready to embrace all that this little person has to offer.

The months that lead up to this much anticipated moment are surely well worth the wait. With comments from the young cousins about when baby Meeka comes...how much longer until baby Meeka comes...will baby Meeka be born soon...and on and on it goes. When we told the kids auntie Amber was not feeling well and it probably meant baby Meeka would be coming soon they eagerly joined me in praying for a safe, quick arrival. Although as a mother I knew the hardwork ahead I also wished all the best and shortest possible amount of pain to my wonderful sister-in-law. Once Meeka was born I jumped out of bed to dress and make the short trek to Langley hospital and visit my brand new nephew. Later that evening the rest of the family joined me on a return adventure to hold, snuggle, and kiss this new little man in their lives.

Upon entering the hospital Jake informed me that, "we've never had a cousin before", Lanae told me, "Baby Meeka's my friend mommy and I'm going to help change his diaper because I'm a big girl" and Sam quietly strolled along until we reached the designated room. Upon arrival baby Meeka was finishing his dinner and of course being the knowledgeable older brother, Sam kept his distance but Lanae had no qualms peeking under the receiving blanket looking for Meeka and checking out every part she could actually see. When Meeka was ready to emerge Sam waited with eager arms to hold him for the first time. After about an hour the kids were clearly eager to get out of the small space. We headed home with each talking about how cool it was to have a cousin. Sam was sure he would be baby-sitting soon and Jake couldn't quite grasp how come baby Meeka was so small in comparison to baby Annie (who now seems like a giant)! All in all it's been a great experience so far and I pray the best possible transition over the next few weeks for Tim and Amber!

Excitement!

2009-08-28T14:02:00.000-07:00

A few more!

A Daddy for the first time! Love the exhausted look on his face but clearly joy at holding his newborn son.

My first nephew. You can't imagine, unless you've been an auntie, the joy of holding a newborn that you haven't birthed but know you love almost as much. I have waited for what seems like eternity to feel the comradarie of parenthood with one of my siblings and knowing that I can now share in the joys and pains of raising children with my brother (who also happens to be one of my best friends) makes this moment all the more special.

Grandma again! I imagine for my mother there is no greater joy than seeing a healthy grandbaby and knowing that her children can experience life's most precious gift all in one little package.

Uncle James is pretty excited about his new title as well. Thankfully we all have awhile to get used to it.

Summer Vacation

2009-08-12T14:37:00.000-07:00

Although I would like to post some individual pictures it's pretty hard to capture the essence our vacation with only a few and I have over 600 pictures. Granted I can't put some of them on for "security purposes" (as per my little brother's instruction) but the ones of my kiddos and "fun" ones I'm allowed to share over the internet. Most of you who read my blog are aware of our recent vacation to Regina and the purpose of our trip. Since Tim prefers I don't share much about his current occupation I will leave it at the fact that I am very proud of all my younger brother has accomplished and all he will accomplish serving his community.

Our road trip was a success in all ways imaginable! The kids were great, hanging with my parents and siblings was great and seeing Tim after six months was fabulous. Our drive included 12 hours on the road to Calgary (well more like 11 with the time change) on Thursday and 8 hours on the road to Regina on Friday.

We stayed in a Best Western in Regina with a great pool and waterslides and attended all the great family festivities planned from Saturday to Tuesday. We headed back to Calgary on Tuesday afternoon and stayed with my Aunt for the night. Our original intention had been to go to Calaway park again this year on the returning Thursday but the weather was not cooperating so we drove home that day instead.

The kids were disappointed but dealt with it really well. I was probably the most disappointed because I was pregnant last year when we went so I didn't get to go on all the rides. Anyway, once we got home we went to "The Great Escape" in Langley instead. It was fun and pretty reasonable. Saturday we capped off the holiday with a Pig Roast at my parents place for Tim's return and Joel's birthday celebration! It was a full day of fun, family, food and funniness (those who attended would understand that last one)! Needless to say I'm happy we chose to make this trek and although it was a lot of driving it was well worth the time spent!

O Canada

2009-07-02T17:18:00.000-07:00

A wonderful country we live in! Sometimes when I am feeling reflective I begin to think what would have been should God have seen fit to place me in this world in a different country. Perhaps somewhere European, somewhere American, somewhere African, etc. How much different my life could have been, how much different my circumstances would be, how much less I might have to be thankful for. I try not to be complacent or take for granted the abundance I have but as a human being that can creep in without so much as a thought. Yesterday was a gentle reminder of all we have to give praise for...a beautiful world, a great country, amazing friends, family, life!!! I'm not sure I need to say more but, "Thank you Lord for all you've given".

We started out the day with a great homemade pancake/waffle breakfast with three other families, then off to the parade where we met up with three more families, then home for a restful afternoon, complete with naps all around and quiet time as a family, then off to an evening bbq with four other families and topped if off with some great fireworks. Needless to say it was a busy, fun-filled day with some exhausted kids at the end but everyone was happy and feeling very patriotic. James said that this day of the year ranks close to the top of his favorites and I have say, "well said James, I think you're right"!

Celebration!

2009-07-02T09:58:00.000-07:00

This is just a tribute to a wonderful couple whom we have known for many years and recently celebrated their 30th wedding anniversary! Dave and Nancy Collins are the kind of couple that anyone would want to know and emulate in their own lives. They are dedicated to each other, their family, their faith and living a "real" life. In the last few years we have had the privilege of getting to know them on a more personal level. They love each other deeply but don't pretend to have it all together. They are great parents but know that every child is unique and as they grow will make their own choices and mistakes, knowing this you can see how they let go and let God. They seek God's will and know that not every choice they make will please Him but they also recognize that in his graciousness God allows us freedom to come to him in our own time and in own way. They've seen goodness and struggle in their lives but from an outsider's perspective they have weathered it well.

I am blessed to know them and as the picture below indicates my children will also reap the benefits. I pray God grants them many more years of love and life!

My Beauty

2009-06-22T16:35:00.000-07:00

I could not resist this beauty! My daughter has so much spunk but there is no question that she is a stunning little lady. I can only imagine what she will be like as she gets older but I can only hope that this innocent, soft inner beauty that I see in this child remains as she grows to a young lady!

Our clown

2009-06-22T10:26:00.000-07:00

So Jake has always been our clown. He loves to make us all laugh and he is rather good at it (he's also very good at making me want to pull out my hair when he's whiny)! Anyway, these video clips are of his preschool fieldtrip to a local dance studio to do some "dance". For anyone who knows Jake they know he LOVES to dance, break dance, hip hop, etc, basically anything that requires a little bit of body movement. We are thinking of enrolling him in a hip hop boys class. So these are for your enjoyment.

Finally here is a little clip of his preschool graduation. I can't believe he starts kindergarten next year. I'm not sure I'm quite ready to give him up yet. Of all my kids he's my most affectionate (so far, I guess we'll see what Annie is like). He loves wholeheartedly and has no problem showing his feelings. Thankfully I have one more year of having him home half days because I think I'll need a gradual transition to having him gone all day.

And one last one of Annie doing her army crawl. She is such a happy baby, the last few days she's been kind of grumpy but she's teething so we gotta give her grace for that. Other than that she's super content and such a joy to have in our family. The kids love her dearly and dote on her constantly. In my family my brothers and I always joked about how spoiled our baby brother was but as a mom I watch my three older kids with their baby sister and I know it's inevitable that little Annie will always have our hearts.

2009-06-21T22:19:00.000-07:00

Alright so this video is my very first ever since getting a new camera for my birthday and a new computer for James for Father's day. I am having so much fun taking pictures, editing and blogging now that I have all the appropriate technology. These first videos are a few of Sam's baseball games. So far baseball has been the only consistent sport in Sam's repetoire and one he is quite good at. He is an amazing athlete with a love for the game and a natural inclination to understand the concept. Every coach so far has been completely impressed with his abilities. We continue to encourage him to be both competitive and sportmanlike in his athletic endeavors and know that as he continues to be involved in sports he will learn many valuable life lessons!

These videos are of Jakie and his baseball games. He's also a natural despite how we thought he would be a bit clumsy! I can't quite figure out if he picked it because of watching Sam so intently for the last two years or from practising on the Wii but either way he's quite good. He can hit the ball almost as far as Sam. Although he's planning on playing Friday Nite Basketball in the fall I imagine that baseball will be a part of his sports repetoire as well.

A collage

2009-06-21T13:43:00.001-07:00

These are mostly for the benefit of Tim (my little bro in Regina who hasn't seen the kids in 4 1/2 months) but the rest of you can enjoy the pics of my beautiful children as well. Hopefully I'll figure out how to get some video footage on here to!

Soon...

2009-06-19T10:11:00.000-07:00

Okay this is just to let anybody know that actually follows my blog that I will be updating with pics soon. I just have to figure out my new computer and then I'll be in full force.

Turning 30!!!

2009-04-29T20:51:00.000-07:00

So as many of you have already acknowledged I celebrated my 30th birthday today!! Wow just saying those words makes me feel a little bit older. Thanks to my wonderful children, a great husband and fabulous parents, I did in fact feel like today was a special day. Despite being woken up at 5:30 by my beautiful daughter the day got off to a good start. Sam woke up at 6:30 and realizing I did not want my day to start with a fight I let him go about his business. Good choice mom! He popped into my room at 7:00 to see if I was awake and give me my birthday present. He'd wrapped it in a gift bag and made a special card, which he signed from him and Jake. It turned out he'd picked out a beautiful blouse for me when shopping with my mom a couple of weekends ago. She had no clue he was up to that until they met at the till (it was a small store) and he brought along the desired shirt. Mom warned me that I might not like it but as it turns out my 7 year old son has amazing fashion taste! He wanted me to wear it all day but between walking the kids to school and doing laundry I figured I'd save it. I changed my mind as the day wore on thinking how special it was that he wanted to give me something. I got all "dressed" up for dinner and then ended the day with a Dairy Queen ice cream cake donned with the numbers "29"! Smart man, that husband of mine, I have now entered the years of being perpetually 29.

All that to say that 30 isn't so bad, at least not so far. I had a moment today realizing that I have four beautiful children, I'm done having babies, pretty soon I'll need to start thinking about a career and my children are growing too fast! But overall I just realized that there is nothing in my life I regret, nothing in my life I wished I'd already done and knowing there are so many more, good years ahead of me. God has blessed me with a great family, both immediate and extended, and many, many great friends. What more could a 30 year old girl ask for?

Me and my dad!

2009-03-27T22:12:00.000-07:00

I don't have any pictures to go with this one but just some words of love and encouragement and hopefully wisdom for those with dads close by!

My dad and I have never really shared a close relationship. Anybody that has known me for any length of time knows that my mom and I have always been really close and shared a pretty strong bond. My parents were always open about the fact that I was born before they were married and for the first 2 1/2 years of my life it was just my mom and I. Probably that was part of the reason we became so close, it started out just the two of us. My dad entered back into the picture and it wasn't like I actually remember him ever not being there but those are formative years. At times throughout my teenage years I could see the envy my dad had for that relationship but couldn't quite see his way through developing ours any deeper. To be honest I probably wouldn't have responded much to it anyway since I loved the confidante I found in my mom. Having said that over the last five years my mom and I have seen our ups and downs because of a variety of life circumstances, choices made on both our parts to take that relationship for granted and just generally a normal progression of changes in relationship. But in that I have found an ability to appreciate who my dad is and what he has done in my life and why I need to find as many opportunities to show him how much he means to me!

After the last 2 years of my dad being out of town for weeks at a time and short visits upon his return I have realized I would greatly miss his calming and stabilizing presence in our family. My dad is quiet, there's no question but in that quietness he has taught us many things. From the outside (because I know my mom doesn't see her marriage as perfect) I have watched a man love his wife unconditionally and support a great many hopes and desires. I have seen a man who chooses acceptance of his children for who they are despite having felt rejection from his own father because of who he is. I see a man who wants desperately to give his family all he can possibly give even when the sacrifice may be more than he should be willing to sacrifice. I see that faith isn't always visible in regular church attendance or deep spiritual discussions but in everyday living and quietness that many people fail to appreciate. I know that whatever should happen in my life I can depend on my dad to love me and do whatever he can to be a part of the life I've chosen no matter what turns it may take.

Over the last couple months, as I've evaluated my relationship with my children and made the effort to "date" my sons, I've chosen to make that same effort with my dad. The first time was kind of awkward, just as much as it was with Sam or Jake. It felt forced to really talk and I didn't want to get too deep not really knowing what he was comfortable with but this last time was awesome as we spent two hours over tea and coffee and dessert just talking about life. A moment here or there getting deeper than the rest but overall just enjoying being together and connecting in a way that will hopefully bring us closer in the years to come and be a support for what we will both face as life continues to change and throw curve balls that we may or may not be prepared for!

Next time I imagine will be even better and as I continue to pursue this bond I truly hope and pray that God will honor both our desires to love and uplift each other in our regular interactions.

Too long...

2009-03-27T21:51:00.000-07:00

As the time flies by I'm constantly being reminded to enjoy this stage as all too soon it will pass and my little ones will no longer be little. As many have told me there is a bittersweetness to your last child and I can clearly see how this holds true. My baby girl is now 5 1/2 months old and I'm watching as she grows from tiny newborn, to baby and all too soon it will be toddlerhood. She's already eating far too much rice cereal in a day and trying hard to "play" with whatever we sit in front of her. She's a wonderful fourth baby and too entirely sweet. As I watch her grow and learn I am allowing myself the opportunity to both enjoy and grieve these amazing transitions. I find joy in seeing her discover and begin to understand her world. I appreciate that once she is out of diapers I won't have to change anymore dirty pants and find myself facing middle of the night feedings or any other nighttime activity engaged in by babies. But for the most part I find myself shedding a tear or two here and there in the reality that I will never again experience the sweet moments of tenderness holding a completely satisfied, snuggly newborn, or nourishing a little life as only a mother can, or hearing the quiet mewlings of a tiny baby. It is on to the world of mischeviousness and "real" parenting. Letting go and teaching how to do things on their own. I may find myself more and more often wishing for those days when I could simply gather them in my arms to quiet their simple protests.

For the moment I will try to simply enjoy the wonderful moments of babyhood that will come with my last little munchkin and love this beautiful little girl that God has blessed me with. In all honestly I will truly eat my words of mockery towards my own mother in her "mothering" of my baby brother because only now have I truly understood how much that last little one can bring so much rich emotion into your life and the changes of perspective that come with the last little chicken entering the big, wide world.

A day to remember

2009-03-07T22:55:00.000-08:00

So it's been awhile since I've blogged and although it's way to late in the evening to blog right now I had a few minutes to upload my pictures and because it was such a cool day I thought I might as well do it now.

Today was the Grand Prix for Awana. For those who don't know what that is here's the low-down. Awana is a clubs program for christian kids to participate in. They learn bible verses, play games and are basically challenged in their spiritual walk. The Grand Prix is a special day set aside for each child and parents who want to participate in creating a car and racing it against other kids cars. Although James and I have not chosen to put our children in clubs we have made it a priority for them to participate in the Grand Prix. It's our third year and although it makes for a really long day it is neat to see a big group of kids hanging out, enjoying each other's company and doing something fun.

Last year James, Sam and Jake all made cars. Jake was the only one who took home a trophy and it was a second place in the Novice B division. This year the Davenport men cleaned house. Sam and Jake raced against each other in the finals and Jake took home first place, while Sam proudly claimed third. Then James took home second in the pro division. My men don't worry about their design (despite the fact that James does design type stuff for a living). The boys just draw a picture of what they want daddy to cut out and then they sand and paint them together. It's a quick, easy, manly thing to do together and they enjoy every minute of it.

Here are a few pictures of their fun moments!

Next year will be an entirely different look because Lanae will want to participate as well so it won't be the manly, boy time but it will still be completely enjoyable. It was so much fun watching them celebrate and enjoying being together.

Growing, Growing, Growing

2009-01-30T22:31:00.001-08:00

As some of you may or may not have noticed I posted about Lanae moving into her "Big girl" bed last night for the first time. I was so excited to get my old daybed set up complete with rod iron hearts and porceline knobs! Seeing my old bed set up for my beautiful little girl was such a fulfilling vision. I'm not quite sure why but knowing that I was passing something on to my little lady, despite it being material, feels good.

She was absolutely fabulous as James tucked her into bed and cuddled her before coming to find me. I went in to say goodnight and saw her tiny little body snuggled into the duvet barely even peeking out. She took up so little of the bed I'm sure she could have easily have gotten lost but she giggled happily while she informed me of her new bed.

A friend asked if I was a bit sad, seeing the time fly and I have to admit that I was ready to move her into this next stage of life, especially with little Annie so close behind. Of course there is a small part of me that watches this beautiful little princess grow and grow and I know a moment in time will come when I hardly recognize the tiny girl as she stands before me a grown woman. I can only hope that I will cherish these moments as they come and remember how precious she is. Perhaps my good friend's comment will serve as a reminder that I should not push her too fast into growing up and miss what little time I have with her as a little child, eager to giggle and snuggle!

Some ramblings....

2009-01-10T22:19:00.000-08:00

The pictures below really do speak a thousand words but sometimes I feel the need to explain the ramblings in my heart and mind to others rather than just to myself!

Over the christmas holidays I enjoyed my family in a way I have not ever before. When the time came for my oldest two to return to school I really did feel a tug on my heart at how fast time is flying by and how these moments I love will never return. It's not necessarily a sad reflection but a reality check for me that my days are indeed numbered, known only to my Creator, but most important is how I spend them regardless of how many there are.

James was able to take a few days off here and there and even hearing him grudgingly return to work once his days off were complete reminded me how blessed I am to have a man who not only allowed me the freedom to bring four children into our family, but also allows me to stay home to raise them and himself, enjoys as much time as he can possibly get with them. As I have had the opportunity to reflect with several friends lately on the unfortunate moments in our marriage when we do not see eye to eye and chose to allow our emotions to take us places we would not rationally agree to go I am thankful that James and I share a faith and belief that God is greater than all this and can help us overcome those desperate moments that could, in fact, tear us apart.

I can honestly say as I glance at the pictures below that God has brought me to a very content place. Sure we are still dealing here and there with minor crisis' but in the grand scheme of things I see that there is nothing terrible about where we are at. As I remind the kids often that we have food to eat, clothes to wear, a roof over our heads, beds to sleep in, and the list goes on and on and on. Our every need is met and most of our desires have also been fulfilled. It's more than I can say for many other people in our world, so for that I am grateful.

Anyway, I could ramble on and on with random thoughts, probably a good reason to blog more often but I should in fact go to bed because although my sweet baby girl is a great sleeper and very pleasant in general she still has a tendency to awaken rather early. So thank you to those of you who are still checking my blog and hopefully you will find something encouraging here as I have found from many of you.

This is where it all began...

My four beautiful children who continue to delight and frustrate me every day and probably for many years to come! I wouldn't have it any other way.

A family I am so proud of! Nothing more could possibly be said.

A few pictures

2009-01-10T22:11:00.000-08:00

Just some randoms shots from around Christmas!

Lanae turns 2

2009-01-10T21:45:00.000-08:00

I know it's been a long time since I blogged so part of my evening tonight is catching up with everyone on how our family is doing!!! Life has been crazy as any mom knows regardless of how many children you have. I'm thankful for my health and the ability to chase after these little munchkins at such a fast pace but I want to try and enjoy them at this stage as well. Having said that here are a few memorable moments with my beautiful eldest daughter as she continues to grow from toddlerhood to little girl.

This picture was on her birthday when Uncle Tim decided to show her how funny it would be to try and fit the plastic hamburger in her mouth. Needless to say Uncle Tim could get the whole thing in his mouth and still have room but little Lanae could only get it in this far. It's pretty good for a 2 year old. I guess it's just a good indication of what we might have in store in a few years.

This is one of the beautiful gifts Lanae received. A very sweet red jacket, one I'm sure will be remembered for years to come.

For those who know Lanae, you know how much she loves shoes so I decided to make a shoe cake for her birthday. I had so much fun decorating it and then watching her reaction to it.

Here she is trying to blow out the candles. It took a few tries and many encouraging words from the rest of the party animals but she finally managed to blow it out herself.

And of course how every little girl feels when she's full of sugar and received way too many gifts and really just needs to head to bed. Thank goodness for granddads who are willing to put up with a few tears.

She has arrived...

2008-10-23T19:24:00.001-07:00

So after my ranting and raving about being frustrated here is the beautiful entrance of our lovely second daughter into this crazy world. This first picture was taken two days before she was born at 38 weeks 6 days pregnant.

Annika Joy Davenport was born at 10:00pm on October 15th, 2008, weighing in at 7 lbs. 8 oz. and was 19 inches long. She was born 40 minutes after my water broke and technically that was pretty much the length of my labour. Of course as any woman who has been pregnant knows contractions can occur for some time before full blown labour takes place and this was the case as I had contractions all day but nothing that amounted to much. She was born so fast that the midwives did not make it but with the help of a very wonderful husband and four amazing maternity ward nurses I delivered the last of our beautiful children. Here we are shortly after she was born, just the three of us. The nurses pretty did their thing and then left us alone to bond with our little girl.

The kids have all been great with their new baby sister. Lanae loves to hold her and kiss her but thankfully has not tried to pick her up by herself yet. She pretty much listens when I ask her to leave Annie alone.

Jake is a snuggler as most people know! He loves to hold Annie too but it only lasts for a few minutes at best. He's getting better and I know he's going to have a special bond with her.

Sam is definitely my biggest helper. He is very good at holding Annie and if I need to go do something he'll make sure she's taken care of and our of reach of the other kids. He's definitely a kid person in a quiet sort of way. He informed my dad shortly after Annie was born that he was planning on having 4 or 5 kids of his own. I guess Grandma and Grandpa better get a big house because not only are they going to be having a lot of grandkids, it sounds like their going to be having a lot of great-grandkids too.

Finally she opens her eyes. As a typical newborn she still spend much of her time sleeping. She has been amazing at night so far allowing me to get a good 7-8 hours of sleep. Not all in one go but with at least one 3 hour stint and one 4-5 hour stint. I can't complain as she is a very easy little girl so far.

Here she is at a few days old...

And at 1 week exactly. It's amazing to me how much they change in the first month and even in the first week.

So at some point I will post a picture of our completed family. We have been blessed with two wonderful boys and two beautiful little girls. I know we will face many challenges in the years to come but God has been good to us in giving us four healthy children and as my own wonderful mother has said so many times, "as long as we have each other, we have everything we need"!!

Waiting, Waiting, Waiting....

2008-10-12T19:27:00.000-07:00

Another post without pictures but just a few thoughts to share of a frustrated pregnant woman. Why is it that even though my due date is still 9 days away I feel so incredibly eager for things to start happening NOW? I'm sure little Annie is not in a rush to make her appearance as I have yet to feel anything that resembles a serious contraction but I feel like because my other three were all early she should definitely show up any day now.

My last midwife appointment was Tuesday and there was progress but nothing significant. I have another appointment Tuesday afternoon and I'm really hoping to get things moving along. In fact my good friend Janelle is hoping for the same day. How cool would that be to share a birthday in the same year!

Anyway, I'm sure my next post will include pictures of our beautiful addition but for now you get to enjoy the ramblings of a very pregnant, very tired lady!

Date Night

2008-09-25T08:56:00.000-07:00

For those of you with kids I can imagine that you've all made the effort to go out on a "date" with your child from time to time. Although the younger they are the less enjoyable it can tend to be since it usually turns out like most outings where you spend the entire time parenting rather than just being together but as I discovered last night, as my children grow the experience of "dating" them can be an amazing bonding experience never mind preparing them for relationships in their future and, more importantly, cementing the bond between parent and child for years to come.

Last night Sam and I agreed to go out to look for a Halloween costume for him and then continue on with a date night. I was a little tired but really wanting to accomplish this time together since it's only a few more weeks before baby arrives. I suggested to Sam we head to Winner's (since that's where my mom got Lanae's adorable ladybug outfit) and then we go to a place where James and I, and many of my girlfriends and I, spend very productive evenings, AFTERTHOUGHTS!!! He proceeded to inform me that he just wanted ice cream with smarties in it, ie, McDonald's McFlurry. I was not about to spend the evening "dating" in McDonald's so I tried to entice him with tales of huge pieces of chocolate cake, chocolate mousse, hot chocolate with whipcream, etc. He didn't really seem that excited but I think he sensed my lack of enthusiasm for McDonald's (could be my outright refusal to take him there but I'm not sure...). Anyway, we got to Winner's didn't find what we wanted and headed to Afterthoughts. He kept asking how long until we get there, is that the place mom, etc. All the questions that kids normally ask but today I was determined not to lose my patience and just enjoy the fact that he wanted to be there with me and even held my hand as we went from place to place. When we got there we decided on sharing a HUGE piece of Cookies 'n' cream cake and each had a hot chocolate. We found a table and dug in. For those of you who know Afterthoughts you know how big the pieces are so we obviously didn't finish it (much to James' enjoyment, since he got the leftovers) but we had fun talking and being silly. There were moments of course that I had to be "mom". When he tried to eat the cake without his fork I very firmly informed him you can't do that on a date! I realized it wasn't so horrible what he was trying to eat with his face in the cake but it was desperately embarrassing for me! In the big scheme of things is it really that big a deal and then I understood that part of this "dating" thing is teaching my sons how to act on a date and what ladies enjoy when they are out. Really what I'm accomplishing here is a service to my future daughter-in-law as I help my sons understand the need for chivalry, class, kindness, and all those things that a woman needs so desperately to feel special and unique to her spouse.

Of course the evening wouldn't have been complete without a few moments of reminiscing on my part about how my son has grown from a tiny infant to a seven year old boy. He no longer has the tiny fingers and toes and little button nose, now he has long spindly arms and dimples on his face that appear whenever he smiles. I can't say I miss him being a baby but I do realize that he's growing up so fast and I really need to take every opportunity to enjoy who he is at each stage.

The evening ended pleasantly, with a stop at Walmart and the purchase of a Darth Vadar cloak, mask and light saber, and then off to bed where he fell asleep quite willingly with a smile on his face. All I can say is thank you Lord for blessing me with this child who so often has me pulling my hair out but every once in awhile there are beautiful moments which I will forever cherish and look back on with the knowledge that my son is "mine" only for a short time so I am going to choose to give him as much of myself now as I possibly can!

Just a few things!

2008-09-19T08:59:00.000-07:00

So this is our kitten (Thanks again Rob and Andy) and she seems to enjoy food but at the same time have some serious problems eating it. I always thought cats were the neatest creatures alive but it appears we got the exception. My friend, Heather, tells me kittens are actually quite messy and although that should make me feel better I still don't particularly enjoy cleaning cat food off a cat.

So in the first one she managed to just get one front paw dirty but by the time she was halfway through eating she figured it was better to just climb on in!!

Well at least I know she's getting food in her. She's always getting way more active and playful. We don't have to feed her from dropper (thank goodness because that was getting old) and she now uses the litter box without having to be shown where it is. I guess we'll be moving from one baby to the next around here.

On a much cuter note here is the my little ladybug. Grandma could not resist the really great deal and cute outfit at Winner's and I have to agree that it was definitely a good choice. So this will be Lanae's halloween costume this year and Baby Girl's in the following years. It's also just fun to dress up in from time to time in the "pitty dess" as Lanae fondly refers to it.

Happenings!

2008-09-11T09:40:00.001-07:00

Of course so many things tend to happen in fall and it's hard to keep track of them all! I love this time of year so much and now with my kidlets in school it makes it even more exciting.

So here are a few of the things that have happened in the last few weeks since I posted! Sam & Jake both started school! Both love school so much right now which is a relief to me. Jake was more than eager to just get dropped off at his preschool class for the first day without me but thankfully I got to stay and observe. The second day Nana just dropped him off and he waved at the door. He wasn't even really ready to leave when I finally did come pick him up. Oh well, just goes to show that you never know how your kids might react! Here are a few pictures of the boys on Jake's first day of preschool.

Then of course Lanae gets some time with mommy and this is how we make good use of our time together, just girls!!

Of course no blog entry will be complete without a report on the status of Baby #4 (I guess I could refer to her by name but it's much more fun just waiting until she's actually born). This is me at 34 weeks preggo (taken just two days ago). She's definitely grown in the last 2 weeks and I'm starting to feel the discomfort of pregnancy but I know it will be well worth it once she finally arrives.

Finally here is the newest addition to our ever expanding family! Thanks to some friends of our, http://imjustdandy.blogspot.com/, we have adopted a tiny little furball who still needs to be fed from dropper! Yes we are suckers and I know we'll probably wonder why the heck we did it just like every other pet we've owned but for the moment she's kind of cute and the kids really like her. Finally the girls will outnumber the boys in our home! Make sure you check out Andrea's blog to see how they managed to rescue the little lady.

Fall Days!

2008-09-03T22:17:00.000-07:00

Okay so here are a few things that have already been going on in September!!! We are in the homestretch for baby to be making her appearance. In this picture I am 32 weeks! As of today I am 33 weeks, 1 day so that means I have anywhere between 5 1/2 weeks and 7 weeks before she actually arrives depending on how early she decides to make her appearance.

We made it to the PNE this year as well. It was a great time with Mom and Dad Neufeld, Amber and Tim and the kids. We haven't gone since Jake was a newborn so it was neat to go again and see everything that's been happening. I have to say that it's really not a big deal to only go every few years though since not much changes.

Another big highlight was that Sam had his first official football game at Rotary Stadium. He was pretty nervous and was a little apprehensive to play but ended up gearing up no problem and had a great game along with the rest of his team. They won the game 32-0 and all had so much fun. Jake was a great cheerleader for his big brother, although he really did wish he could be the one playing!

I am very happy to be heading into the fall and getting back into a routine. Sam has started school although it's been a little crazy with getting classrooms figured out but he has some good buddies in his class and he is very eager to get started on his schoolwork. I bought him a math workbook tonight that he would have loved to keep going on which is very encouraging to me! Jake is also starting preschool this year. He starts on Monday which can not come soon enough for him. Although I am so excited to have the time with Lanae and of course a quieter house in the mornings when the baby comes I am going to miss my snuggle bunny at home. Jake is wonderful kid despite his tendency to whine. He's very loving and cuddly and a pretty good listener. I know it will be good for him and he's ready but it will take a little bit for me to adjust to the fact that he's growing up so fast.

Anyway, I'll post some pictures of them going back to school next week! For now I'm caught up and hopefully my next big posts will be of baby Annika's arrival

Tidbits

2008-09-03T22:07:00.000-07:00

Here are a few other pictures of fun things we did! The hotel we stayed in was great. It was very spacious with a bedroom, bathroom, kitchen, dining room and living room. It had a queen sized bed and t.v. in the bedroom and a queen sized bed and t.v. in the living room. We really enjoyed the time together as a family and of course took full advantage of the swimming pool on the six floor of the hotel. It's kind of weird swimming on top of a building plus being surrounded by all these skyscrapers!

We also had the opportunity to visit with some great friends while we stayed downtown. We met Brennan Jarvie, Carmen and Jon were in our caregroup when they lived in Abbotsford. Mike and Debbie Weibe and their kids and Heather and Graham DeGreef and their kids, were also there for a short visit. It was great to see old friends again.

Overall it was the best family holiday we've had so far and although the drive home was a little harder (took the same time) but this time the kids, mostly Lanae, knew it was a long drive home and didn't want to sit still or quietly!

The Calgary Zoo

2008-09-03T21:55:00.001-07:00

Another great place to visit of course is the Calgary Zoo. It was a little anti-climactic after the amusement park but neat for us to see nonetheless. My aunt Linda came with us and we spent the morning and part of the afternoon just looking at the many different kinds of animals. Sam was our little photographer for the day so most of the pictures of the animals are pictures he took. Not bad if I do say so myself. I didn't include to many different animals since most people who have been to a zoo know what there is there. But I had to include a few of the baby animals and at least one of our favorite animals, the gophers. I don't know the kids thought they were so funny but they really enjoyed watching the little gophers popping in and out of their holes and sitting up looking around.

All in all it was a great day!

Calaway Park

2008-09-03T21:37:00.000-07:00

So if you ever have a chance to get to Calaway Park if you're in Calgary I totally recommend it. The park itself is completely kid friendly and geared mostly to kids between the ages of 2 and 11! Lanae could ride on at least 5 rides on her own and probably somewhere around 20-25 with a parent. Jake and Sam could ride on at least 25-30 rides on their own and a bunch more with parents! I couldn't believe how much fun we had. We got to the park at 10:30 and started riding at 11:00. We didn't leave the park until 7pm (which was closing time).

The kids had such a blast and it was definitely a highlight for them. I would love to do it again in a few years when the new baby is old enough to enjoy and before Sam becomes "too cool" to help his younger siblings on some of the rides.

Sam's favorite ride was the roller-coaster. Unfortunately it went too fast to get any good pictures so you'll just have to imagine a similar coaster to the red coaster at Playland in Vancouver. Jake's favorite ride was the mini-coaster and the mini-hellavator (yes they had one just like the big one at Playland, except smaller)! Lanae's favorite ride was the boats that went in a circle. I didn't get a good picture of that one but it was pretty tame and the three of them could ride it alone.

First Days of Holidays

2008-09-03T21:26:00.001-07:00

Okay so since we've been back from holidays for awhile now and I've actually managed to edit all our photos I thought I'd better blog a little! We had a wonderful time and I am so looking forward to doing a big family vacation every two or three years now that James does not have to save his vacation time for new babies (after this year anyway)!

The kids were amazing on the way in and we actually made really great time. We left for Calgary at 5:30 on Saturday morning, August 3rd and arrived at my Aunt's house at 7:30pm. We probably stopped for a total of 2 hours which means that with the time difference we got there in 10 hours! It definitely pays to leave early and avoid the crazy highway traffic.

We celebrated Jake's 4th birthday on Sunday with a walk, some family time and a birthday cake. The cake is supposed to be Aipom's head (for those of you who do not have children interested in Pokemon, that's one of the characters)! Jake was very happy with his cake but not excited about the walk at all as you might notice looking at the picture of Sam trying to play football with him. We also had the chance to meet with my Dad's uncle Harvey and Aunt Sarah (whom Jake is playing cards with). We used to visit them when I was a little girl and they still look exactly the same.

Road Trip!

2008-07-31T10:35:00.000-07:00

So in two sleeps, as James and the kids remind me, we are heading out for our first ever Davenport only family vacation! When Sam was a couple months old we did go on a short family vacation to Kelowna which was very fun but we have yet to do this with just our kids since then.

I wouldn't consider myself an experience road-tripper, even though I did haul the boys across Canada, through the States, two summer ago when I was 6 months pregnant with Lanae in a trailer with my in-laws. But I would say we have a few things figured out. The kids are excited to go to Calgary and have made maps for us to follow. They are set with their DVD player (thanks to our good friends the Tams) and travel games, books, etc. We'll see how well these three little munchkins do with 12 hours of driving.

We have a plan to visit my aunt for few days, who lives in Didsbury. Then head down to Calgary for a day of shoppping, a day at the zoo and a little reunion of sorts with Carmen, Jon and Brennan Jarvie along with her sister Heather and family as well as Mike and Debbie Wiebe. A lot of fun packed into 8 days!

We'll let you know how things go when we return and if you think about it pray for us that it would truly be a great time of family bonding and much needed relaxation before the craziness of the new school year begins again!

Just a few pictures to share

2008-07-31T10:27:00.000-07:00

So here are a few pictures I wanted to share that were kind of fun.

First of course is the beautiful growth of our dear little Annika! She is still a quiet little one, which remains to be seen if that's truly her character or just a trick for mommy to enjoy now! I am 28 weeks along which leaves 12 weeks of countdown until her due date. If she follows the same pattern as my other three we should be welcoming her closer to 11 weeks (maybe in time for Thanksgiving)!

Here is a picture of Lanae and I. I was just having fun with the camera and she looked extra cute that day. She loves to say cheese and pose for the camera and now that she knows she can see the result she comes faithfully to stand beside me while I wait for the digital image to come up!

Finally a picture of my beautiful children after a full evening at grandma and grandpa's house. We had a lovely walk with my mom and dad before my dad headed back to Fort McMurray for his next round of three weeks of work. And yes that is Lanae wearing a cloth diaper held together with duct-tape. Unfortunately daddy got everything except the diaper bag but thankfully we had some fun figuring out what to do instead!!!!

Just reflecting...

2008-07-22T20:43:00.000-07:00

I was reading through my journal today and came across something I'd written that actually just illustrates how I feel about my life right now so I thought I'd share!!!

May 16, 2008

Sometimes being a mom can be so overwhelming and then other times come along when we feel the joy deep into our souls. As I reflect on the last years of the normal trials we've faced in child-rearing I can see God's faithfulness throughout. He's blessed us with three healthy, active little people and a fourth happily taking residence in my body for the time being. A crazy mix of personalities, ideas, emotions and expressions I wouldn't change for the world. God's love is evident to me in the daily forgiveness I receive from my almost seven year old son who fights with me nonstop but is so much like me, I sometimes do a double-take. Or in the giggles I hear coming from behind a closed door and later find all three super heroes wrapped in their "blankies" pretending to be Captain Underpants. One day I know the commradarie of childhood will end and be replaced by teenage impatience, a never-ending flow of youthful "wisdom" and a busyness I can only begin to imagine. But for now I can choose to allow God's fullness to envelop me and enjoy the memories being created.

One of those amazing memories being created is definitely happening this summer as I watch Sam grow into a young man. He's playing his first season of tackle football and as a mom it's hard to squelch those feelings of "my son's the best out there" but for the sake of his pride and with the knowledge that that attitude will not help him become a better player I've managed to quietly watch him practise and encourage without being over the top about it. But I will say this that he's trying his best despite feeling a little overwhelmed by the intensity of the sport and as an aspiring athlete has already received some recognition from the local paper. Here's the link to read about Sam's contribution to history.

http://www.canada.com/abbotsfordtimes/news/sports/story.html?id=ccc036b7-4538-4648-aa0e-5e338a228154

Anyway, as I find myself so content this summer I am being reminded how short-lived these years tend to be and how I absolutely MUST intentionally enjoy them before they pass me by! One day I'll wish them back only to be hit with the reality that it's too late and you can only live your life once. And more importantly you only get one chance to be a great mom so make the best of it, mistakes and all!!!

Presenting....

2008-07-09T19:37:00.001-07:00

Timothy and Amber Neufeld! So now that they have seen their pictures I feel safe posting the link to their proofs.

Paul McDermott did our family pictures when Lanae was a newborn and we plan on hiring him again in the fall for family pictures with our newest addition. He does a wonderful job of being creative and capturing the moment.

Tim and Amber look absolutely stunning and we are so happy for them. Enjoy!

http://www.pmdphotography.com/neufeld/

P.S. to scroll between pictures just click to the left side or right side of the actual picture and a little arrow pops up for you to click on.

Another Neufeld married off!!!

2008-07-02T13:30:00.000-07:00

So this weekend was full of festivities for the Neufeld family! Tim & Amber are now officially Mr. & Mrs. Neufeld and we all had the opportunity to celebrate with them. Unfortunately I don't have a lot of pictures of the bride and groom mainly because I was too busy snapping pictures of my own adorable children. But I figured I'd leave that up to the professional and when we got the proofs I'd attach a link of their
pictures for all to enjoy.

The kids did great all weekend despite being up until 10:30 almost every night. Sam did a great job pulling the wagon down the aisle and Lanae and Jake both stayed quietly in the wagon. Jake blew a few bubbles and Lanae even threw a handful or so of flower petals. They also all danced the night away at the reception. As was to be expected Jake was the center of attention with his dance moves. I didn't have a video camera to capture the moment but I'll be sure to get one when Joel gets married.

Upon reflection I have to say that it is odd to have another brother married. I mentioned to James that after 8 years of being the only sibling married it feels a bit surreal that two of my brothers are now married men within a year of each other. It feels good to know that our family is expanding and I'm sure before we know my kids will finally have cousins. The boys are definitely starting to notice that they don't have that luxury. They keep asking me when I'm going to be an Auntie? I tell them they have to bug Auntie Trish and Uncle Bennie about these things but all in good time!

Anyway, now for the description of these fabulous pictures.

Here is Jake blowing bubbles for Uncle Ben while we wait to have our professional family picture taken.

This is Sam patiently waiting in the van while Daddy goes to get some new shades. A good looking kid if I do say so myself.
border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5218518165932565122" />

Here is Lanae at the train station in Fort Langley playing around the station house.

Here are the three sweethearts hanging out in the wagon waiting to walk down the aisle.

Here we are at the reception waiting to eat.

A tired little girl after a long weekend.

My two sons getting ready to break it down on the dance floor. Sam was a little shy but Jake had no problems hamming it up and pulling out his best moves when the dancing started.

James and I in our token shot. Too bad it's always one of us behind the camera.

What's so special about today???

2008-06-12T09:46:00.001-07:00

Well after rising with the birds (quite literally since the birds outside Lanae's window were chirping at 4:30 and she couldn't sleep through it) I feel a little tired and washed out. Life gets busy right. We all know that and days pass without so much of a notice! What would we do without special markers to remind us of the things we need to be thankful for!

Today is special for a number of reasons of course. I woke up to a really annoying call of mommy so early in the morning but shortly after I realized that the beautiful face of my little girl is too precious to really be frustrated with too long. Then I was blessed to hear my second comedian of a son talk about how he was going to marry his brother. Thankfully he realized after a quick chat with his dad that he actually had to marry a girl, however he proposed to his older brother that they marry the same girl! It was definitely worth a laugh. Then I dropped my "football star" off at school today and was thankful that even though he's a little resistant to the new way of doing sports he is a great little athlete and loves to run, practise and get dirty. Now as I sit here and feel my last little gymnast practise his/her moves I am grateful mostly to my husband who loves me enough be patient and walk beside in this crazy life.

Yes the main reason today is special is because I celebrate 9 years with a great guy! He's patient, kind, caring, compassionate and loving even when I'm my most unlovable (which is a lot these days what with all the hormones coursing through my body)! What would I do without him you ask? Well to be truthful I'm sure I would survive, God is gracious enough to get us through everything, but I really wouldn't choose that. I love to share my life with him. I love to laugh, cry, pray, talk, etc. with him whenever I get the chance and I really can't imagine how much I would be missing without him in my life.

I know I sound really sappy, probably because I'm really exhausted but mostly because I really do love the guy I got to marry. Hopefully he knows it everyday, even when I forget to tell him.

Here's to 9 years past and many, many more to come! Love you James!!!

Baby Davenport #4

2008-06-08T22:35:00.000-07:00

For those who are checking I have had a few requests for updates about baby so here goes! We had our ultrasound on May 30th (Sam's 7th birthday) and everything went great. All measurements of head, heart, spine, hands, feet, etc. were right on target with nothing noted as abnormal. Baby was measured at 18 weeks 6 days (my calculations said 19 weeks 3 days) so we were within a few days of each other and that's as it should be. From what the tech said she was verily confident regarding gender (although they always say it's not 100%) but they were not able to reveal to us directly. They will send the results via "snail" mail to our midwife when I have passed the 20 week mark according to their calculations which would mean they will put the results in the mail tomorrow. Since I have decided not to find out the gender but James would like to know the midwives will either call and speak to James or they will simply leave the results in the envelope for James to look at. He is quite certain that we are having another girl but I think he might be going on wishful thinking as I feel pretty sure it's another boy.
Here is the picture from the ultrasound of the baby's profile. It doesn't look quite as much a Davenport as the other three did in their pictures but that could just be the quality of the picture.

Everything else is going great. Baby has started moving quite a bit and the kids are looking forward to when they can actually feel the baby themselves. I think we might have had a growth spurt as well since I seem to be popping out a little than even 5 days ago. Anyway, in no time at all I'm sure I'll feel huge.

Here is a picture taken today at 20 weeks 5 days by my calculations or 20 weeks 1 day by the baby's measurements.

Hope that satisfies all the curiousity and I'll be sure to keep you updated as things progress.